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im new to all this divorce and child support/custody stuff. i mean everyone keeps telling me all different things so im kinda lost. ok here goes:
1)what does child support cover(like food, clothing, shelter, medical) any and all of those or no?
2) since my ex like wants nothing to do with the boys should i let him have full visitation rights or just give him set times and all? i mean i think he should have set visitation since he dont wanna take the time to talk to or see the kids on cam when hes always on with his girlfriend.
3)ok well i found out my ex is going to ft hood tx and will not ever be deploying again, and hes willing to come see the kids. but heres the thing that really bothers me about that: he wants to take the boys out of the state to ny to see his parents, and i dont trust them one bit. they had talked about before stealing the kids from me, and thats what im so worried about. i mean i wouldnt be worried if i never heard or seen that from them. and they refuse to sign something stating a date and time the boys would be back here to me. and i have no clue what i should do? or if i do let them go with him, if he doesnt bring them back to me, if theres anything i can do about it?
4)also since hes got full medical coverage on the boys, and told me that everything was taken care of and that its alright to use the dr we had been(which it wasnt), but we got charged half the bill. does that mean i should take care of it or him, cuz everyone says he should since he knew it wasnt right and all that and he never did check in with the people?
5)hes never even bought them birthday gifts or anything for christmas or whatever, but wants me to for him outa the child support. i dont know if i should or shouldnt,i mean i think its his responsibility not mine, and if he really cared he'd do it himself.
6)also he wants me to lie to the judge and army saying he gets the boys 6 months outa the year(which he wont), just so he can get a house on base. and i told him i dont wanna do that cuz i aint willing to get in trouble for him...but should i or shouldnt i?
7)and i dont know how to break it to him that the kids dont know him like at all: my oldest has known him for not even 17 months, and my youngest has known him for like 6 months. i mean they dont know nothing about him, and i dont really wanna break his heart when theyre gonna not want nothin to do with him or to even go by him or anything. i mean its really not my problem but i dont want him to think i did it when i didnt. so how do i help this situation? |
| Posted by on 06/18/2007 09:50 AM
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Cassie,
First off, do you have a lawyer? You need to read up on what the laws are for the state you guys live in..there are all sorts of website you can go on for legal questions like you are asking. Also, if you don't have a lawyer, they will give you up to 15 minutes free consultation time--maybe even more where you live. If you are military you should be able to do that on base but becareful because my ex is military and he got a good lawyer and I ended up getting the bad deal of it all--and he's the one that left me!
Your lawyer should tell you what the child support will cover, but it covers shelter and food...anything outside of that should be paid in half by the both of you...most women don't mess with the little things like haircuts, school supplies, ect..but when it comes to clothing, medicine...sports..you get him to give you 1/2 of that money if he isn't doing his share of anything else. Get it all in writing! The courts can't enforce what isn't written down. If he is paying for the medical coverage, then that is deducted from his child support, but I'd make sure I'd get it in writing that he is to cover the expenses either 100% or no less than 50%--for everything! You also get him to help you out with the outstanding medical bills. If he fights you, threaten to take it to his commander.
2) if he doesn't want anythign to do with the boys, then he needs to cough up the money to help you support them. And if you don't want to give him visitation then you take it to court and get him to sign off that he doesn't want anything to do with them. He still will have to pay. Child support is based on how often/frequent they see their other parent. If you agree in writing that he will have the boys 2-3 days a week, but in reality he won't...don't agree...you can always allow him to see them..but don't agree to something in writing you know won't happen. If realistically you know he'll see them every other weekend, then that is what his childsupport will be based upon. Same goes for grandparents. Grandparents don't have legal rights as far as I know unless your ex gave them to them, but they can sure give you a good fight..you get it in writing...and I'd make sure that the visits were supervised if you don't trust some of them. As for out of state, that should be something that is in writing..if it isn't..you don't need to allow it as far as I know.
3.) As for birthday gifts, that is just crappy...he can get them presents and leave them at his house...and what you get them...you leave at yours...that is how most everyone I know does it.
4.) do not agree to lie for your ex...Living on base is nice at times for the kids if they were there on a regular basis, but sounds as though he is trying to pull the wool over you...and I would never lie for him.
5.) as for telling him the kids won't know him...he'll learn that. you don't need to tell him. I had this discussion with my ex because he is air force and flies all over the place...is rarely home and doesn't have a stable life at all...as of late it has gotten better and he has stepped up to the plate more after I had a discussion with him that his daughter cries for him and pleads for him at night..and he should start calling at least once a week to say hi...when she is to go with him she doesn't want to because she doesn't know him...he'll learn unfortunately when it is too late. If he is slime its best to keep them away..but if he is making efforts to see them, its best that they know you are trying to do your part. You don't need to sacrifice yourself and life, and the kids any longer though....dont' let the abuse continue afterwards.
You can't deny a father visitation unless you get it in court. If he wants his boys and there is no restraint against him, he is entitled to see his sons if it is agreed upon. You can't however force him to see them.
Hope this helps. If you ever want to chat off-line...my email is cbarmoy@yahoo.com
Cat |
| posted by Cathleen on 06/18/2007 01:46 PM
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Sufficient identifying information must accompany the legal process in order for the Defense Finance & Accounting Service to implement the order. At a minimum, the information must include the following: the member's full name, date of birth, SSN, current military status and, if known, the member's current assignment.
Enforcement of garnishment order may be accomplished by sending a request for involuntary allotment via certified or registered mail, return receipt requested to:
Garnishment Operations Directorate,
Code L-Last 4 digits of member's SSN,
DFAS, Cleveland Center,
P.O. Box 998002,
Cleveland, OH 44199-8002
Requests may also be faxed to the following commercial fax numbers indicated by the last 4 digits of the member's SSN-NOTE: You will not receive a return receipt if you fax the order: Last 4 digits: 0000 - 1249: (216) 522-6819, 1250 - 2499, (216) 522-6951, 2500 - 3749, (216) 522-6821, 3750 - 5000: (216) 522-5372; 5001 - 6250, (216) 522-5371, 6251 - 7500: (216) 522-6817, 7501 - 8750: (216) 522-5958, 8751 - 9999: (216) 522-6819.
Call commercial (216) 522-5301 or DSN 580-5301 for additional information.
Statutory Allotments for Child Support and Alimony, (42 U.S.C. 665, 32 C.F.R. Part 54):
Federal law authorizes allotments from active duty military pay in order to satisfy child support and alimony obligations. Alimony alone will not qualify under this law. These statutory allotments may only be paid from active duty pay.
A statutory allotment may be initiated when child support and alimony payments are at least 2 months in arrears. The allotment is initiated by furnishing the DFAS Center a written notice from a court or state agency administering the child support program under Title IV-D of the Social Security Act. The notice must be signed by an authorized official and must contain the following information:
A statement that the person signing the request is an agent or attorney of a state that has a Title IV-D plan with authority under the plan to collect money owed by a military member as child support or child support and alimony. The request may also be signed by an agent of the court issuing the order.
The statement must include the military member's full name, SSN, the dates that the current support terminates for each child, and the exact name and address of the allotment payee. The statement must also show the total amount of the allotment to be taken and specify the amount to be paid each month for current support and the arrearage.
The statement must be supported by a recently certified copy of the original court order awarding support and a court order which specifies the amount of the arrears and that payments be made to liquidate such arrears.
Allotments cannot exceed 50 percent of a member's pay and allowances if the member is supporting a second family. If the member is not supporting a second family, the allotment may not exceed 60 percent. The percentage may be increased by 5 percent if the arrearage is 12 weeks or more.
After DFAS receives the request, DFAS notifies the member's commander. The commander will then notify and counsel the member. The member will have 30 days to cure the arrearage or to submit evidence that the arrearage is an error. If not, DFAS will ordinarily implement the allotment 30 days after the member's notification. Payments will begin at the end of the month in which the allotment is to be effective.
In Part III-- Retirement Pay Division
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| posted by A on 06/18/2007 06:15 PM
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People in military gte additional pay for children put inorder to garnish his check you get yur money.........Do not listen to his excuses.Read chils support carefully Who responsible for medical at exactly rather 100% or paid by both parent certain percentage........medical,food,clothing,after school care or child care.........extra curriculum activites e.g sport events,martial Arts etc.
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| posted by A on 06/18/2007 06:20 PM
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Interstate child support cases
The federal Uniform Interstate Family Support Act (UIFSA) provides that New Jersey child support can be carried out if the non-custodial parent of your child lives out of state.
This law requires employers to comply with other states’ income withholding orders and puts limits on where orders can be changed.
This law also protects the non-custodial parent by making sure that only one current order for support is in effect at any time. It establishes rules for creating only one order when there are multiple orders.
If a non-custodial parent moves to a different state in order to avoid paying child support, he or she may face federal criminal prosecution.
Direct deposit
The New Jersey Child Support Program also has a direct deposit program. Direct deposit means that support payments that individuals currently receive by check may be deposited directly into their bank accounts. Direct deposit makes receiving support payments faster, easier, and safer. To be eligible for direct deposit, you must receive your payments directly from the New Jersey Child Support Program.
HOW TO START DIRECT DEPOSIT
To sign up for the Direct Deposit Program, you must complete an AUTHORIZATION FORM and mail it to the address indicated on the form. The file is available for download below. It takes approximately two weeks from the time we receive your Authorization Form for the direct deposit to begin.
Once direct deposit begins, any payments received will be sent electronically to your financial institution and should appear in your account within two to three business days.
Download: Direct Deposit Authorization Form - English
Receiving Child Support
The New Jersey Child Support Program offers two options for receiving support payments – direct deposit or the New Jersey Debit MasterCard® (NJ Debit Card) – that make receiving support payments faster, easier and safer.
Direct deposit means that support payments are deposited directly into the custodial parent's bank account (either checking or savings). To be eligible for direct deposit, you must receive your payments directly from the New Jersey Child Support Program. To sign up, you must complete an authorization form, which is available at your local child support office or can be downloaded by clicking here.
Custodial parents who do not already use or apply to use direct deposit will receive a NJ Debit Card. Your support payments are posted to your NJ Debit Card account. You do not need to have a bank account. You can use the card to get cash at banks and ATMs, make purchases or get cash back, and to check your balance. Each month you will get one free cash withdrawal per deposit. The NJ Debit Card offers a 24-hour customer service line at 1-866-461-4094; or you can visit their website at www.eppicard.com.
Custodial parents who are starting or changing direct deposit or starting a New Jersey Debit Card account should allow approximately ten days for payments to reach the account.
EMANCIPATION
There is no fixed age in New Jersey when support stops. Once your child turns 18 and/or becomes financially independent, either you or the other parent must file papers with the court asking that the order be terminated or adjusted. This is known as "emancipation." Based on the facts, the court will decide if the child still needs support from the parents. Generally, the court presumes that children under 18 need support from their parents. In some cases, support may continue through college or longer. Support may terminate automatically if your current order specifies a date, age or circumstance when support stops.
Child Support Guidelines
What if the non-custodial parent doesn't pay?
If the non-custodial parent doesn't pay, Probation will take steps to enforce the order. If not previously ordered, this may include requiring the non-custodial parent's employer to take money out of his or her pay, having the past-due amount taken out of a tax refund or lottery winnings, returning the case to court or reporting the delinquency to a credit reporting agency. Probation can also execute on the non-custodial parent's property such as bank accounts, insurance proceeds, cars, boats, or real estate
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| posted by A on 06/18/2007 06:22 PM
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New Jersey child support have a good resource page could answer few your questions
FAQ |
| posted by A on 06/18/2007 06:23 PM
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