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| yea, a little, the only way to beat it is to plan activities durring the day, even if your little one is still too small to do anything but sit there. When my son was about 4months old I was going stir crazy so I started putting him in the stroller(carseat stroller combo) and we'd go for a walk twice a day OR we'd take the dog to the park and even tho he slept the whole time or part of the time it still kept me from going nuts. And when it got warmer out we'd go have a picnic in the back yard or we'd go sit under the tree in the front yard and watch cars go by...cause at that point he was sitting up without support. We also use to go up to the outlet mall(only one redlight away from me) and just walk around, people would stop and comment on how cute he was/is and he(as long as they don't try to pick him up or touch him) loved the attention. It was good for both of us |
| posted by Amers on 01/07/2009 01:41 PM
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Hi Kristie,
I too went through the same thing when my daughter was born up until she was about five months old. I did the same thing Amers did and that helped me too. But I also talked about it to my husband and my mom. Talking to them really helped me at one point I called my mother up 5 times in one day because I got so bored and depressed she helped me alot. During that time the only family I had near me was just my husband so it was hard because we moved when I was 8 months pregnant. So I had nobody. Now it's much better. My daughter is now 11 months old and "sometimes" I still get a little bored or lonely so I still try to race around. I just recently enrolled her in swim classes. I am hoping to meet other moms there too. ( I just moved AGAIN)
Good luck and try not to stress out. |
| posted by Holly on 01/07/2009 01:48 PM
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| YES!!! It is very isolating to be home with the baby all day. I am going to sign up for a mommy and me class as I think that is the best way to meet other moms who are home during the day as well. I try to keep busy daily, even if that means just going window shopping or taking a walk. Anything to get out of the house will suffice. |
| posted by Maureen on 01/07/2009 02:23 PM
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| YES!!! It is very isolating to be home with the baby all day. I am going to sign up for a mommy and me class as I think that is the best way to meet other moms who are home during the day as well. I try to keep busy daily, even if that means just going window shopping or taking a walk. Anything to get out of the house will suffice. |
| posted by Maureen on 01/07/2009 02:23 PM
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| YES!!! It is very isolating to be home with the baby all day. I am going to sign up for a mommy and me class as I think that is the best way to meet other moms who are home during the day as well. I try to keep busy daily, even if that means just going window shopping or taking a walk. Anything to get out of the house will suffice. |
| posted by Maureen on 01/07/2009 02:23 PM
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| YES!!! It is very isolating to be home with the baby all day. I am going to sign up for a mommy and me class as I think that is the best way to meet other moms who are home during the day as well. I try to keep busy daily, even if that means just going window shopping or taking a walk. Anything to get out of the house will suffice. |
| posted by Maureen on 01/07/2009 02:23 PM
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| YES!!! It is very isolating to be home with the baby all day. I am going to sign up for a mommy and me class as I think that is the best way to meet other moms who are home during the day as well. I try to keep busy daily, even if that means just going window shopping or taking a walk. Anything to get out of the house will suffice. |
| posted by Maureen on 01/07/2009 02:23 PM
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| try www.meetup.com to find mommy's groups in your area...getting out helps :) |
| posted by on 01/07/2009 02:55 PM
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| Laurens right, I just returned from one. It truly does help. It's tough, very tough... being a SAHM especially when people don't view it as a "career" so its best to talk in forums like this and surround yourself with other SAHM's. I listen to Dr. Laura on the radio a lot too, it boosts my mommy-esteem up from time to time... you're making such a huge investment being at home with your child but unfortunately it takes awhile to reap the rewards so in the meantime, hang in there, do stuff you love, appreciate this time cause it goes by wayyyyyyyyyy too fast, and checkout meetup.com its awesome! Best wishes! |
| posted by Candice on 01/07/2009 04:42 PM
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Here's another FREE suggestion, visit your local library. We just LOVE ours. They also have a lap-sit program where you get together with other parents and infants/ or toddlers and sing songs and learn finger plays. I also let my son pick out ten board books then we read them over and over again while we have them checked out. We both get a lot out of it, and he'll even sit and "read" them himself.
I also will check out books on items of interest just because I can--like I said...it is FREE!!!. You may find this very boring, but I just LOVE it-- I recently got a book on how to fold dinner napkins. I also got a book with pictures of animals that my son and I can look at. It is time with him that I truly treasure!
Good luck! |
| posted by Liz on 01/07/2009 05:12 PM
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Kristie, I've been a SAHM for 4 months now, but I will be going back to work on the 19 th of this month. I've set myself on a strict schedule this week & it makes me feel like I accomplish something throughout my day. I've been getting up at 5:45 (okay, so I set the alarm for that time and end up getting out of bed at 6:30, but anyway) I take a quick shower, get dressed and do my hair and make-up. By the time I'm dressed & made up my daughter is up. I feed her, spend time w/ her and as soon as she takes a nap, I DONT TURN ON THE TV or COMPUTER anymore, but clean. Now that I'm on a strict schedule I've actually showered before 3 pm!!! I know it's not a huge thing, but there were times when I'd feel like "F*&k, I'm home all day and my house is a mess and so am I" which would make me feel sloppy and dirty on top of those feelings of loneliness. Now that I'm pretending to have to be somewhere or done w/ something by a certain time, I no longer stop in between dishes to hear what they are saying on "The Morning Show w/ Mike & Juliette"
Being a SAHM really is a F/T job, but I know I was guilty of not treating it like one. At work you cant put stuff off, and at home, I find I do and this would leave me feeling like I didnt do anything at all all day. |
| posted by April on 01/07/2009 05:29 PM
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| First of all, I love that picture of your baby, she's beautiful! It is a huge adjustment becoming a mom and getting use to a whole new lifestyle. The first 4 months for me was awful. I kept wishing I had my old life back. I had a really hard time making the transition and I felt so guilty about it. My moodiness was effecting my marriage. I ended up going on Prozac since it seemed like I never felt happy and let me tell you it helped me so much. Not sure how "depressed" you feel or if you have a history of depression but if this feeling just lingers on and on, talk to your GYN. I still feel bored and isolated sometimes but I work through it by trying to get out more. Do you have someone who can watch your baby for a few hours once a week? It is really important to estabolish an outside interest apart from the baby. Maybe you could do a little volunteer work here and there. My baby didn't sleep through the night until just recently (7 months old) so if you are sleep deprived that will mess with your emotions big time. You'll find your groove, it just takes some getting use to. 3 months old is still tuff you and can't do too much with them. Wait until she is about 6 months then it will be fun and you will be able to get out for longer stretches and feel better about leaving her with someone while you get some "me" time. Good Luck!! |
| posted by Suzanne on 01/07/2009 08:10 PM
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| I totally agree with Suzanne. I have been a stay at home mom for 14 mo. now, and no plans to return to work. I soooo love being home with my son and can't see life being any other way, but there is a down side. I also have been moody, cranky, unhappy, feeling like there is no light at the end of tunnel, feeling lazy, and the list goes on. I also talked to my doctor and was put on Prozac. Although I am having some trouble with it and going to back to talk to my doctor again. But, anyway, it is totally normal. Don't beat your self up over it, that is what I did, thinking I was a bad mom. Get help, if you need to, getting out does help a lot. But sometimes it is hard to get out. I live outside of Chicago, so winter time is not a time to be taking your kid out a lot. I sooo look forward to spring and summer. But again get help if needed. Taking care of you makes you a better mommy. |
| posted by Kim on 01/07/2009 08:21 PM
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| I think the saddest part for me was that feeling of not doing anything all day. Like I didnt accomplish a thing at all. It's sad because SAHM's are really doing the most important job ever & yet are made to feel like we dont do anything all day. When you go to work you get the occassional "Good Job" "Way to Go" or "Thank you! You're a life saver" and at the end of that, you still get a pay check as a pat on the back for a job well done. When your a SAHM no one ever does this. So maybe we should toot our own horns and remind ourselves what a great job we do day in and day out! Treat yourself to something nice every now and then and someone said get some "me" time and that's always good. The happier you are as a person the better mommy you will be |
| posted by April on 01/07/2009 09:01 PM
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| suzanne is absolutely correct, when your kid isnt sleeping through the night staying home is as different as night and day...its still hard but it gets easier, more manageable once ur sleep sched is on track! |
| posted by Candice on 01/07/2009 11:04 PM
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| I also join a local moms group through meetup.com. Now we (DD & I) have lots of playdates, lubches, moms night in and out. I also joined to a strollerfitness class, so I can loose that baby belly, and my daughter plays with the other kids during the class. I go to gymboree (Mommy amd me class). I have made lots of friends through the mom groups and I am starting my own soon. |
| posted by veronica on 01/07/2009 11:48 PM
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| This message is for Kim: You mentioned you are on Prozac and having some difficulty. If you are on the generic switch to the name brand. It is more expensive but it is so worth it. I was on the generic at first and it made me a zombie, I just wanted to sleep all day. I switched to the name brand and it is way better!! There is a huge difference here between the generic and the name brand. You will still have some side effects but they should go away after about a month or so. |
| posted by Suzanne on 01/08/2009 07:54 AM
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| One thing I can suggest is joining a gym with a good child care service. It gives you a chance to get out of the house and also give you a break from your baby. Plus working out get your endorphins going which helps with the depression. And even if you don't enjoy working out it gives you some sanity time being around other adults and you can meet other moms too. I work in a Kid's Club at a gym and I know lots of mom who go there strictly for the social aspect of it. Just a thought. Good luck! |
| posted by Melissa on 01/10/2009 09:29 PM
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