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Ok, so I know I'm over protective w/ my daughter, but who cares, right? Better safe than sorry & if I dont protect her, who will, right? Well, I feel there is no need for anyone else to change my daughter's diaper but me (so long as I'm around) for 2 reasons. #1) I can ensure I clean her properly (wouldnt want her getting a rash or infection) #2) Who wants 100 people telling you "I changed ur diaper when you were a baby?"
Well, my daughter's dad insists he wants to take care of the baby for an entire day all by himself. I asked "And who's supposed to change her diaper?" He said "Me. Not like I havent changed a diaper before"
Does anyone else feel that NO male should be changing her daughter's diaper? Not like my baby's dad is a sicko or child predator or anything, but in a world were evil is everywhere, you just never know, right? Am I wrong for thinking this way? |
| Posted by April on 12/10/2008 04:04 PM
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| Diaper changing, like bathing, playing, feeding, ect is a bonding time. I see no problem with a child's father (boy or girl) changing the diaper, as long as he understands that with a girl, you must wipe front to back. Considering he is her father, in my opinion, he has the right to change her diaper if he wants, as well as take care of her for a day if he likes. Of course, an exception would be if you were needed because you nurse her, but other than that, and if he is not a sex predator, I see no reason that he not be allowed to change her diaper. |
| posted by Casey on 12/10/2008 04:09 PM
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| Thank you! I have family and friends who think that is not right, so I needed some more opinions before making a desicion. Plus I should be glad he even wants to change dirty diapers, right? ha ha ha. I know I wouldnt volunteer for it or push the issue if I wasnt "allowed" to |
| posted by April on 12/10/2008 04:13 PM
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| My husband changes our 5 month old daughter's diapers all the time. In fact, he is the only person who has ever given her a bath, me included. Bath time is THEIR time and I love the fact that he takes so much interest in her. If I didn't trust my husband to take proper care of our daughter, I wouldn't have had a baby with him. |
| posted by Michelle on 12/10/2008 04:20 PM
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| Like you said April, you should be glad for any help that he is willing to give. I often had to bribe DH to change diaperswhen our son was little. Something that might make you more comfortable with it is if he changes diapers around you for awhile so that you know he is doing a proper job getting her clean. Then you can feel better about leaving her with him for a day. I agree with Michelle as well. If I did not trust my husband to take proper care of any children we have, I would not have been in a position to have a child with him. |
| posted by Casey on 12/10/2008 04:33 PM
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April,
You should be jumping up and down that your husband wants to help out. I do however understand you not wanting too many other people changing her diaper -- it was hard for me to get use to the people at daycare changing my daughter's diaper. You better bet I still make sure to check things out daily (you just never know). |
| posted by Erica on 12/10/2008 04:37 PM
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I believe it is both parent's jobs to change diapers, feed, bathe, etc. Bravo that he wants to be so involved!
Parents are a team, Mom & Dad are together in all this. Taking too much of the responsibility alone sends the message that you don't trust your baby's dad or something.
If it's not OK for a dad to change his daughter's diaper, then what about a Mom changing her son's diaper?
Obviously none of my remarks apply if you feel that your baby's dad is predatory or abusive. I'm just trying to offer another opinion... |
| posted by Bethany on 12/10/2008 04:58 PM
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| I honest dont see no problem with a father changing a babys diaper and pluse you should be lucky that your husband wants to spend a hole day with his daughter because im having trouble getting my husband to get out of bed long enough to say hi to his son im having to play mom/dad with our son its sad just trust your husband to spend one hole day with her and see how things go you never know |
| posted by Nicole on 12/10/2008 05:26 PM
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| Thank you all sooo much! I'm feeling better about letting him stay w/ her. I guess having worked w/ someone who had to put her own husband in jail for abusing their own daughter, doesnt help. Plus w/ all the things you see on TV (news, talk shows, etc). Just Monday they were interviewing a spanish singer on a Spanish TV station & brought up her court battle w/ her ex, who not only abused their two daughters, but her younger sister too. Regardless of our differences, I DO trust my baby's dad would NEVER do something like this. I know sooner or later he'll have to be alone w/ her, so I need to get over it. I guess I just need to pray so the Lord will always protect my daughter and NEVER give her father any evil sick thoughts. |
| posted by April on 12/10/2008 05:27 PM
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| I totally understand where you are coming from, some for different reasons though. It is not that I don't trust my husband with my son, I just didn't trust anyone with him. Not for sexual reasons, just that they could not do it like I could. Everytime my husband changed the diaper it would leak, he just never got it on right. And I could not stand the thought of being away from my son for a day. But you will get to the point that you kind of get over that, as I did. My husband never even put my son to bed until he was 11 mo. I realized that I was sick of this and wanted a little freedom, so I caved and now my husband is allowed to put him to bed if I am not home, and he changes diapers. If you can get over those kinds of issues, then let him do it. It is good for him and her. |
| posted by Kim on 12/10/2008 10:51 PM
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| We can switch husbands anytime april! lmao. I'd die to have a hole day for myself. I do love my daughter to no point but you need a break once in a while. My husband throws a fit everytime I try to get out for just a few hours. YOU ARE SO LUCKY he is willing to take care of your kids. Take it and go shopping. Have fun! I don't like people changing my daughters diaper because some people don't even tell you if she has a rash or what. I was very protective of my daughter. I didn't even like people holding her. And she was about 1 1/2 when she first had a realitive watch her for a few hours. So when your little one gets a little older you will want to have some alone time. |
| posted by Kris on 12/11/2008 09:35 AM
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I have a cousin and an uncle who are going through a similar situation where the mother of their children doesn't want to let them see or spend time with his child. Personally, I think it is wrong for a mother to with hold a father from doing anything that a father is supposed to do. (please don't take that personally...I'm talking in general)
You should feel very happy that the father is wanting to spend time with and change the baby's diapers. I had to ask my husband to do that and he threw a major attitude every time. It was very seldom that he freely offered to change a diaper and he doesn't exactly spend time playing with her either. He loves her but just doesn't show it very well.
A dad that wants to do that should be allowed to freely and given the chance to do so as often as possible. Children need their dad just as much as they need their mother. Girls especially need their dad. It will affect the relationships they will have later on in their lives while dating or getting married.
Please, allow him to spend time with her. I don't think you would've had a child with him if you really thought he would hurt her.
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| posted by Jessica on 12/11/2008 12:12 PM
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| There is too many trust issues with this situation. I believe husbands/daddies are supposed to change diapers, bath, feed, massage babies. Regardless of their gender children need to feel the love and compassion from both parents (if available). They are supposed to feel comfort and ways to feel this is to be taken care of in all aspects. |
| posted by Cristian on 12/11/2008 02:43 PM
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| I was raised by just my Dad. We would have been in a lot of trouble if my Dad had not changed my diapers! Please check out Attachment Parenting on www.askdrsears.com. Dr. Sears is a Pediatrician and founder of Attachment Parenting. He strongly believes that fathers should change diapers, and you can read articles on why. |
| posted by Julie on 12/12/2008 10:30 AM
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