|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
| Need to Vent Group |
| Public online group |
|
|
| |
|
|
| My daughter and i got into a big dispute today.all over her grad pad party and wedding in the future.i always invite my ex to bdays and holidays.i believe its good for the kids.he pays very minimum for support.but i still invite him.my daughter expects me to invite his family to her big events like grad party ect.and me pay the bill of course.ive accepted the fact im bonded for life with my ex.but not his alcoholic dramatic family.1 main reason we divorced was over them.i hate them.i told my kid no way! if she wants a party with them.he can give it.she says my family is snobby and boring.and she adores his becuz they drink and have raw humor ect.when is the cut off point for exes family?we are divorced.kids see them on his visits.they see my family when i have them.thats fair right? he wont even help with her braces or college let alone parties.i dont want to be stuck affiliating with those people for life! |
| Posted by amanda on 11/19/2008 06:44 PM
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| Maybe just saying that you will pay for "x" number of people and then since it is her party she has to figure out who that will be. If she wants more than that number from that side of the family then the ex needs to pay. |
| posted by Jessica on 11/19/2008 07:17 PM
|
|
|
|
|
| Don;t send mixed messages to your daughter. If you will not be able to invite them for the sake of $ the added cost that you can not afford at this time, then say that and don;t even bring up that you dislike his family, becuase although you were able to get rid of them with divorce your daughter can not. Help your daughter understand the importance of $ and that the less $ you spend on the grad party the more money available for colledge and wedding. |
| posted by Jennifer on 11/19/2008 07:22 PM
|
|
|
|
|
I agree with Jessica and Jennifer's posts. . You should definitely tell her how many people you can afford to be there, and let her pick who she wants to come. That way it wont necessarily rule out his family. I understand you dont really want to have to deal with them, but it is her party after all, and if she wants them to be there... I think she should be able to make that decision. (but with limitations)
From your post it sounds like you dont have to see his family at all anymore since you've separated. . hopefully it wont be a complete disaster to see them for a couple of hours for her party. |
| posted by Amy on 11/20/2008 08:12 AM
|
|
|
|
|
| Thanku for your advice.i didnt feel like i was giving mixed messages since i came out and told her that i wasnt paying for a grand party for them to come and enjoy.i was confused on my feelings.i called my ex and told him how i felt.he understood.he has issues aginst my family as well.so he said hes willing to give her another party at his home with his family.i went back and talked to my kid and told her that me and dad discussed it.and she gets two parties.she was happy.i really felt strongly about drawing the line.its one thing when its just her dad.its another when i have to be around his family.im happily divorced.and its my exes job to keep my kids connected with his family for moments in there lives.and its his responsibity to pay for them at any event. its just best if theres separate parties. |
| posted by amanda on 11/20/2008 09:02 AM
|
|
|
|
| |
| |
|
|
|
| |  |
| |
|
|
|
