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| Parenting Twins |
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I have a three year old son and a set of six month old boy/girl twins, and I still want more children. Not now of course, but in a few years or perhaps even sooner, but my husband says we are definitely done. I cannot explain the grief this makes me feel inside, I still don't feel like we're a complete family yet and we're also very young so I don't feel like we're ready for a big decision like permanent sterilization (vasectomy or tubal ligation) I know that times are tough now days and that it costs more to raise kids than it used to, but I'm willing to bend a dollar to make it work. It has always been my dream to have a full, happy, loud household and I feel like my dreams are being trampled on. Am I crazy? Is my husband right? Should I just bite the bullet and make the big "snip"?? lol
This sounds like a rediculous question, but I have no idea how to even talk to him about it, he's completely unaproachable because he's made up his mind. What do I do? |
| Posted by Donna on 09/22/2008 01:00 AM
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| I am a christian. We were taught to submit to our husbands in everything. Likewise children to parents. This kind of submission preserves harmony in the family while it increases love and respect among family members. You are not crazy neither your husband is right or wrong. Everything must be a joined decision than you will have peace and love. |
| posted by Jane on 09/22/2008 03:58 AM
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I would say just not to make any permanent decisions right away. I always said I was done after my twins, mainly because one has Autism and needs my attention so much, plus, and I guess you can call it selfish, but I was scared to have another one because I know of families with multiple kids with Autism, and I can hardly handle just one with it! I know my limits and I am already pushed over! But that's just me. Now, we did have a 3rd, unplanned. He was quite the shocker because we tried for so many years and finally had to be put on clomid then had the twins, and with my 3 yr old, we weren't trying and like I said, in my head, we were done! But now I can't imagine my life without him. The day he was born, I was ready to have another one! LOL. Probably because they tied my tubes during the c-section! I definatly didn't want anymore, however it is just so final when you get that done, there is no going back. He was such a good baby, but now that he is 3, he is harder to handle than twins!
Sorry, don't know why I had to give my whole story! You actually had a question!! I don't know him, but it sounds like you are not having anymore. I know that isn't fair to you at all and I am so sorry. It sounds like you are a great mom and can handle lots of kids, me, I don't have the patients anymore! LOL but that is great that you do. I would just sit him down and ask him why he doesn't want anymore and explain to him that this is very important to you and he needs to keep an open mind and maybe you can talk about it again in a couple of years.
Good luck! |
| posted by Kari on 09/22/2008 11:03 PM
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