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| do you put infant cereal in her bottle before she goes to bed? My mom did it with me and my sister and i did it with my son and it worked! My son goes to bed at nine and wakes up at 9:30 am for a bottle! and hes been like that since hes been on cereal! |
| posted by Stephanie on 09/09/2008 04:14 PM
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| i wish my son would sleep through the night he is almost 8 months. i have tried everything nothing has worked yet still looking. |
| posted by sheri on 09/09/2008 04:17 PM
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I am going to assume that you are nursing. If you are, try bringing your baby into bed with you. You can either purchase a cosleeping pillow so the baby won't roll off of the bed, or since your baby is old enough, you can put her in between you and your husband.
Sleep with your shirt and bra off and with your baby's mouth nipple level. She will be able to roll over and nurse in the middle of the night without waking either of you. I've been getting a full nights rest every night since I learned this little trick.
There are benefits to your baby nursing at night. Your milk is made up of healthier fats at night, so you are helping your baby be smart. |
| posted by Julie on 09/09/2008 09:11 PM
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My husband would go in and try to get our daughter to sleep and that started to cut out one feeding when she was about 7 months old but one night about her 9 month she just sleeped all night long. She would wake one or two nights every week and half for about a month or so. I think you just have to do a little at a time and when she is ready she'll surprise you and let you sleep all night.
Good luck, it does get better. |
| posted by Anne on 09/09/2008 11:17 PM
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| Is your daughter on any soilds yet? That might help. My son is 6 months and has been sleeping through the night for 3 months. He would wake up twice a night to eat. If he ate 2 4 oz bottles durring the night, that was 8 oz that i tred to make up durring the day. I slowly sarted adding more oz to the daily feedings and he learned to store those calories and slept through the night. As far as the woman who suggest the co sleeping, that sounds like a good idea in theroy. But that will be a VERY hard habbit to break. My cousin did that nd her son is now 2 and wont fall or stay asleep unless he is with her. Good luck. |
| posted by Brenda on 09/10/2008 08:05 AM
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I agree with Julie's post 100%.
Waking up 2x a night to nurse is normal at this point...why not cuddle and nurse then go back to sleep knowing you're doing what's best for your baby? Everyone has their own methods and opinions, but I've read to never put infant cereal in a bottle...check with your pediatrician about this option before trying it, if you were considering this.
Your little one just wants to be held, fed, and comforted at night...enjoy this special time. :) |
| posted by on 09/10/2008 09:28 AM
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| my daughter is 14 month old and waking twice at night too. she eat solids and nurse. So far she sleeps in her own room and crib but stills wakes up to nurse. Pedi said to let her cry for 5 to 10 minutes, comfort her and put her in bed. Do this for up to 45 minutes and every night and usually by the 3rd night she will fall sleep by hersrlf and thru the night. Personally I can't stand my baby crying, and hubby will not help to do this process (the best time to do it is on the weekend). Therefore I didn't follow pedi instructions and I have a 14month baby still waking me up, nursing sucking twice and falling back to sleep. My breast is her comfort toy. If you have a handy hubby try that on a weekend. Don't stop nursing your baby unless she is comfortable letting go the midnight feeding. Ahh same as the other moms check w/your pedi putting cereal in bottle. Mine is totally against it since it is not the best to teach your child to eat solids. |
| posted by veronica on 09/10/2008 05:18 PM
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| Try reading "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. You can get it dirt cheap on Amazon.com. It has tons of great tips and it helps you develop your own sleeping plan. |
| posted by Julie on 09/10/2008 07:44 PM
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| Thank you for the info. SHe is taking the bottle and eating solids twice a day and sleeping in her crib. I am too scared to bring her in the bed with us. I tried the cereal in her bottle for a little while about a month ago and it did nothing so i don't do that anymore. I I will just go day by day and maybe she is going through a growth spurt or a milestone. Thank you for all the wonderful advice |
| posted by Angie on 09/11/2008 12:34 PM
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I was scared to sleep with my baby at first too, but then I did a lot of research, and discovered that a mother will never roll onto her baby. Mothers are naturally in tuned to their babies. The only way you are going to roll onto your baby is if you are drunk, or using some other substance that impairs your ability to respond to your baby. This can include pain medications.
Here is a link to a pediatrician's website where he discusses the latest research on sleeping with your baby.
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t102200.asp
If you do decide to cosleep, there are safe ways to do it. You will find these listed at the bottom of the article. |
| posted by Julie on 09/11/2008 02:53 PM
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| Wow, lots of great advice. I was just wondering if I was the only one going through this and now I see that I am not. My son is almost 9 mo and still waking 2-4 times a night. H is really hungry too. We feed him three solid meals a day two snacks and he gets bottles during the day of 6-8 oz every 3-5 hours and I only nurse him at night. He was doing better about a month a go but we went on a 2 week vacation to the other coast and he is teething, trying to walk and I think maybe going through a growing spurt too but he has never slept through the night. He is a very active baby and he is actually hungry when he wakes up. We have tried rocking to sleep, letting him cry but he keeps crying because he is hungry. We cann no co-sleep becuase I dont get any sleep since he moves so much inhis sleep. We plan on just hanging in there and talking to the ped at the 9 mo check up this month to see what she thinks. If I get any more advice I will let you know. |
| posted by Nichole on 09/12/2008 10:25 AM
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| After many months of sleepless nights I bought Dr. Richard Ferber's book "Solve your Child's Sleep Problems." I dreaded it, but my husband and I were exhausted and so was our 7 month old little boy. I fully expected to be one of the rare parents that it didn't work for, but after reading the book and following his schedule, we tried it. The first night was so much better than I thought it would be and by the third night he went to sleep within about 5 minutes and slept through the night. He's now 13 months old and goes to bed easily after his bedtime routine and sleeps 10-11 hours. The only times we had him wake up once or twice through the night is when he was teething! I was so happy I actually wrote Dr. Ferber a thank you note! |
| posted by Deni on 09/12/2008 05:06 PM
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Hello! I am also a new mother at 38. Little Joseph is now three months. Because I have been sleepless in Nashville, it feels like the longest three months of my life! I would like to have another child, except the first three months is so so tough to get through. Why can't they just come out 3 mos old? Anyway, I have tried the cereal on two separate occasions. Once while he was two months old. He threw up real bad. Again, when he was three months old. The ladies in my family had great success with babies and cereal. I have not. After the second day of putting cereal in Joseph's bottle, he became constipated and stayed that way for an entire day. I cringed every time he had a bowel movement - he cried so bad. My husband and I pledged not to try that again until he is 6 mos.
Joseph finally sleeps at least four hours at a time now, sometimes he reverts back to three but it isn't as stressful now, so I must be getting used to it. I'm thinking about reading those two books mentioned in other posts. At the same time, I also realize that each baby is different and responds to different things. |
| posted by Alberta on 09/13/2008 09:00 PM
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| hi, my baby is almost 10 months old and I thought I'm the only one :) well, I feel better now. Ok, so here is my story (unfortunatelly I don't have any fabulous advice I can post here), I've read about 4 books about "how to put your baby to sleep" (don't buy them, go to your library, if they don't have the one you're looking for, ask them to order it for you) and tried few methods with my husband's support, cause it was NOT easy to listen to my little one's concert for HOURS. well, it worked for few weeks, then again he was waking up, I had maybe 3 nights that he accually slept.. He eats solids for months and cereal in a botlle for months and he is extremally active, seems like, nothing works. I put him to bed around 9PM (there is no way I can do it earlier) and if he wakes up around 1-2AM, I give him water, pacifier, pat in a back and leave.. and let cry, he usually stops after 5-10min. If he wakes up around 4-5AM I simply feed him, he always goes back to bed after that... He started teething then he was 4 months old, now he has 7teeth! So this is what I blame the most, I give him Tylenol, but... I don't know, I hope one day he'll learn "to sleep through the night"... |
| posted by Justyna on 09/15/2008 10:40 PM
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| Hi Angie! My son had the same problem until I discovered a noisemaker/machine at a yard sale for $5. I put it on ocean waves when my son sleeps at night/naps. Ever since then he has slept through the night and even takes a two hour nap in the morning as well as the afternoon. I recommended it to a friend of mine and she bought one from Conair that pretty much does the same thing. I also bought a couple for our room, since we live in the city and it can get noisy sometimes in the middle of the night. I think it also helped block out any noises my son was making in the middle of the night as well, which in turn, helped him realize that he had to get himself back to sleep. My motto: "What you don't know won't hurt you!" Good Luck! |
| posted by Heather on 09/19/2008 09:00 AM
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| oh wow... I just started the CIO method 2 nights ago and this is the third night...I hope tonight goes easier than last night..I am going to wait a couple minutes longer to check on her...which by the way is the hardest thing I have ever done but I know it will pay off...she already cries less each time but still every minute I am not holding her when she cries is sooooo hard...I looked at Ferbers method and am working on that now...I am not giving her the bottle anymore at night either because my ped said she does not need it and she is the right weight for her age and she is just waking up by habit...this is sooo hard and I tell myself, Angie you're not being a bad mom and that this will help her do better because I have read that children do better and are happier when they get more sleep...I am sooo new at this though and feel like every day I am with her is such a blessing.. |
| posted by Angie on 09/19/2008 10:03 PM
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| http://parents.berkeley.edu/advice/sleep/cry.html |
| posted by Justyna on 09/19/2008 11:06 PM
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| http://www.hno.harvard.edu/gazette/1998/04.09/ChildrenNeedTou.html |
| posted by Julie on 09/19/2008 11:43 PM
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| ok Julie, your child is 9 months old, how many nights did you actually sleep? |
| posted by Justyna on 09/20/2008 05:10 PM
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| My entire family (husband included) gets plenty of sleep every night. My son is not on a schedule, and he won't be until he is 18 months old. He takes one nap in the morning, one nap in the afternoon, and he sleeps 12 hours at night. He night nurses twice at night, but it doesn't interfere with any of our sleep. |
| posted by Julie on 09/20/2008 11:46 PM
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| good for you. when my son wasn't on the schedule, he was up from midnight till 4AM and loved to sleep from 11AM till... whenever he wanted.. it was for the first 3 months and I looked like a zombie and was getting more upset with my husband and my baby when he was constantly crying. I tried many things: rocking, co-sleeping, extra feeding, music, etc. He was just one of those babies, that didin't want to switch on his own. After few nights of crying (that I cound't stand and with my husband's support I got through it) he was sleeping at night and playing during the day. I was very happy and now I enjoy every second with my baby, cause I myself get more sleep. You are lucky with your son, so are many parents I know, unfortunately babies are different and trying whatever works it's not being selfish or a bad mom. Mom has every right to want a good night's sleep. |
| posted by Justyna on 09/21/2008 08:51 AM
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I'm not saying that Mom doesn't have the right to a full night's sleep. I am saying that there are more gentle options that work than CIO. I am obsessed with research. When I want to learn about something be it cloth diapers or CIO, I read everything available until I know everything I possibly can know about both sides. In this case, I have read the CIO side, and I have read about the AP side. With full knowledge of the benefits of both sides, and what leading researchers on both sides have said, I chose AP. My son hasn't always slept through the night. It is because I AP him that he does.
The first time someone suggested to me to let my son cry it out, I cringed. I couldn't bare the thought of hearing him scream while I waited in another room. I also knew that I couldn't be a happy and functioning mom and wife in the morning without sleep. I thought I was stuck with the option of CIO or Just Deal With It. I couldn't help thinking that there had to be other options, so I got started researching and that's how I learned about AP. One of the reasons that I chose AP is because they say to avoid doing parenting practices that don't feel right for your baby. It is really big on teaching you to trust your own instincts and read your own baby. These books even go onto say to not listen to AP advice that doesn't sound right to you either. Thanks to AP, I am an expert on my baby. If I can help other mom's realize that they can get a good nights sleep while using a gentle sleep method, than I am going to tell them about it. I really believe you should know as much as you possibly can about both sides of the coin before you make any kind of decision.
The line for for baby sleep advice is not divided between AP and CIO either. Those are not the only two methods. There are hundreds of other methods. That's why I suggested "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley in another post. She is not an AP person. She is just a Mom like us who wanted to get some sleep. She started talking to other Moms to get their experiences, and that is how she put together her book. Her book has worksheets built into it to help you customize a gentle sleep plan for getting your baby to stay asleep in their own bed.
I suggest AP because it feels the most natural for me and because it worked for me. Is it going to work for everyone? Of course it isn't. But, with a little research, you may find a gentle approach that does work.
If you are looking for an AP book: "The Discipline Book" By Dr. Sears covers everything from toddler disputes to stealing, and it has a chapter on Sleep Discipline and how to gently put your baby to sleep in their own room. |
| posted by Julie on 09/21/2008 10:29 AM
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| Thank you again Justyna and Julie for the advice. I have let her CIO for the past few nights and I am sooo much better during the day because she is sleeping longer and better. She only woke up 2 times last night and both times she only cried for less than 3 minutes and this morning she woke up a little earlier than normal (at 530 rather than 630) and cried for just a little longer and she looked so much more rested and I was too. I don't feel so bad about it now that I have talked to other moms who have done it and on here too, you have to do what works for you and your baby. I am glad for the help..I don't feel like a zombie anymore (phew) I still don't like to hear her cry but like I said it is less and less each night (last night was the 4th night) and I still lay there praying and with my hubby help, I know we are all better |
| posted by Angie on 09/21/2008 02:16 PM
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| My father used to tell me that free advice is worth what you pay for it! My oldest son is not a sleeper. From birth until 2 years old, he slept 8 out of 24 hours, generally in 30 minute increments. He is now 12 and still doesn't sleep much at night. When he learned to tell time, we gave him a clock and plenty of books and toys and told him to stay in his room until 7am. Our second child had the same sleeping pattern, until he was about 2, then he improved. Don't get me started on the next child. We tried all of the above and none of them worked. My advice to you? Take care of yourself. If you don't get enough sleep at night, every day have someone come over to watch your baby while you nap. My husband gave me as much sleep as he could after I pointed out that it is WAY easier to deal with adults when you are sleep-deprived (him at work) than it is to deal with babies when you are sleep-deprived. Ask for help and take it when it's offered. Sleep - more important than I thought to sanity!! |
| posted by Mari on 09/21/2008 02:40 PM
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Mari:
you tried all of the above and none of them worked, for how long did you try? but I've read that there are some babies that nothing work, absolutely nothing. I know there are special clinics or specialists for children with sleep disorders..
And now about the advice. EVERYBODY told me to take care of myself and get some sleep. Well, my mom lives in Poland and she couldn't be here with me for the first 3 months and mom-in-law doesn't visit us often, I have few girfriends, but they have school and work or kids on their own and I couldn't afford doula, so... yeah I didn't get too much rest. I couldn't fell asleep when the baby was sleeping and when I finally did... he woke up. gotta love it :) but for all those moms that have people around to help - absolutely - ask for it. |
| posted by Justyna on 09/21/2008 10:05 PM
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Angie:
I'm very happy for you, good luck! |
| posted by Justyna on 09/21/2008 10:09 PM
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Julie:
I agree, do the research and try the gentle method first, this is what I did, and move to a different one if it didin't work. The only thing I promised myself was: NOT TO sleep with my baby in the same bed, cause I know how hard is to break it later, and the longer you go the harder it is... I chose the infant cry instead of the toddler's vomiting, choking, head banging or to sleep with the child till he's 7! (that's just not right).
so here are the books I've read:
1. On Becoming baby wise : giving your infant the gift of nighttime sleep 4th ed. - Ezzo, Gary. (my favorite)
2. The happiest baby on the block : the new way to calm crying and help your baby sleep longer - Karp, Harvey.
3. Baby and toddler sleep program : how to get your child to sleep through the night, every night - Pearce, John
4. Bedtime sucks : what to do when you and your baby are cranky, sleep-deprived, and miserable - Kimes, Joanne.
and the No-Cry Solution that Julie suggested. |
| posted by Justyna on 09/21/2008 10:28 PM
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| I really and truly have to agree 100% with Julie's posts...well put, Julie. You seems very educated on this topic, and I feel the same way you do. I can't honestly read that Harvard article and say that I could ever ever ever let my baby CIO...that's just me. Good luck to everyone. |
| posted by on 09/22/2008 10:39 AM
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| All great advice, one other book that has helped me and my sister is "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" 3rd ed. |
| posted by Nichole on 09/22/2008 02:03 PM
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| I know it sounds cruel, but have you just let her cry? I don't know if she is sleeping in her own room yet, but maybe let her cry for a few minutes before you get her. I did that with my son. I let him cry for a few minutes longer each time. If he nurses, and is going through a growth spurt, he might need to nurse once through the night. But if he is eating good right before bed (I agree with the solid food suggestion, especially for dinner) he should be okay even at that. My son nursed exclusively, and was sleeping through the night at this point. If he is in the room with you, she might be waking up as you shift or moan in the night. Try putting her in her own room. I would strongly suggest not feeding right away once you do go to get her. You sound like you haven't been. My son has a teddy bear that he has slept with since he was about four months old that he snuggles up with as he wakes through the night. She's getting to the independent point, and she's fighting it tooth and nail. I remember this point. My son just turned one, so it wasn't that long ago. *grin* Good luck hon! |
| posted by Gabrielle on 09/23/2008 12:29 PM
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| Angie, I don't know if I missed it...but if you're breastfeeding, the family bed is the best. I'm definitley with Lauren and Julie on this one. My son is now 14 months old (and still nursing). However, when he came home from the hospital, he slept with me from the start. He (we) would sleep 12-14 hours a night with him waking occasionally to nurse. But the nursing never interrupted either of our sleep. As soon as he would start to move around and wake up, I would nurse him and we would both fall back to sleep. No fussing, no crying, no waking the husband...and we all got incredible sleep. Additionally, he would take two 2 hour naps during the day. This routine continued for the next 12 months. I never felt sleep deprived and was able to function as a normal human being on a daily basis. Once again, just another opinion. I couldn't do the CIO method; no one got any sleep. Plus, my own personal opinion is that these little ones crave to be next to us to feel secure. I've read all the books others have suggested on this site, but my gut always told me to keep my son in the bed with me. He will only be this age one time in his life. He's got a lifetime ahead of him to learn how to console himself to sleep and sleep alone in his own bed. Ultimately, you've got to do what's best for you and your family. I just thought I'd interject my story. Good luck with whatever you decide! |
| posted by Allison on 09/27/2008 10:20 PM
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| I have a sincere question for those of you that do the co-sleeping with your infants. Do you feel that the intimacy with your husband suffers due to the presence of your child in your bed? I hope this question isn't coming across as insensitive, I am genuinely curious. |
| posted by Deni on 09/29/2008 02:47 PM
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| Absolutely not. There are other times to be intimate other than right before bed. Truthfully, this was always my least favorite time to be intimate pre-baby because I was so tired from a long work day. My 14 month old still takes 2 naps a day, and a lot of times we wake up before him. I'm just glad we all get enough sleep to have the energy to still be intimate. I know when I'm tired, sex is the last thing on my mind. Good question, though. I'm sure a lot of people were wondering the same thing. In this instance, I can only speak for our family's situation. |
| posted by Allison on 09/29/2008 03:54 PM
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| Same here; co-sleeping doesn't interfere with my and my husband's intimacy. We're too tired at night to think about it anyway! We never made it a habit to be intimate right before bedtime to begin with, so we just continue to be intimate at other times. Plus, we both love sleeping next to the baby at night and being able to cuddle with her. It's especially sweet when she wakes up on my husband's days off and is surprised to find both Mama and Dada with her. |
| posted by AnnaMama08 on 09/29/2008 04:25 PM
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| yeah right! when do you have time during the day?? and one more question: how many years do you want to sleep with your baby...? |
| posted by Justyna on 09/29/2008 09:32 PM
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Cosleeping has not caused intimacy issues in my marriage. If anything, it spices things up because you find yourselves getting quite creative! I have never met anyone who has had a problem with intimacy because of cosleeping.
My husband and I both agree that we will sleep with our son until he no longer needs us. |
| posted by Julie on 09/29/2008 09:54 PM
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