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| Parents of 'Difficult' Children |
| Public online group |
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| Tantrum seem to be my kids MO. And they like to yell at me. |
| Posted by Jennifer on 05/23/2007 10:44 AM
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With tantrums I have two theories: either you ignore them or you yell louder...you can try both! It is not a scientific method but sometimes it works...
Vero |
| posted by Vero on 05/24/2007 10:43 AM
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Tantrums are so tricky. I would vote for ignoring if you don't know why they are having the tantrum. For 2 reasons: 1) Yelling makes me angry 2) The tantrum seems to get over with quicker if I just ignore it. I'm not feeding into the behavior with my own frustrations.
My daughter's tantrums stem mostly out of frustration. For example, she likes to slide alot and at the playcenter they have a slide that has a difficult ladder to climb. Time after time we would have horrible tantrums at the playcenter because she couldn't get up onto the slide. DD is also very independent so helping her climb is not an option. She has to do it herself. One day a lightbulb went off in my brain, and I decided to put a small stool at the bottom of the ladder. DD used the stool and it gave her a big enough boost that she was able to do the slide by herself. We haven't had a tantrum since.
The other thing I would suggest is to make sure you children don't have ear infections. I believe DD has been fighting an ear infection for several months. However, the dr said her ears were clear so we didn't treat it. A few weeks ago she had a temp of 101 for 4 days with no other symptoms. I took her in to the dr. They said her ears were still clear but thought she might be coming down with something so prescribed an antibiotic. Two days on the antibiotic and DD is a totally different child. The yelling stopped, the tantrums have all but disappeared, she's not afraid of other people as much, she plays well with other children, she's even taking turns on the slide at the playcenter and waiting for other kids to go. They can't tell me something wasn't going on with her. I believe that if kids aren't feeling well, and they can't tell us, then they will act out behavior wise.
The difficult part is figuring out what the frustration is and how to fix the problem in a way that is acceptable to both of you. Like adding the stool. It didn't appear to her that I was helping her by giving her the stool so that made her happy. I'm happy because she's not screaming and throwing herself on the floor in front of a bunch of other people. |
| posted by Kati on 05/25/2007 01:32 PM
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| I think I am going to try ignoring it first. May be they will stop. there are three of them and when they are all throwing tantrums it hits my last nerve. |
| posted by Jennifer on 05/25/2007 02:23 PM
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| Something that I have done with tantrums is to put my son in a timeout or even quiet area and tell him that when he is finished acting that way, he may come out. This puts him in control of how long he has to stay. As long as he is tantruming (is that even a real word???) he stays there. When he is calm, he may come out. |
| posted by Jennifer on 05/25/2007 09:55 PM
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