|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
| First Time Moms |
| Public online group |
|
|
| |
|
|
| Hi, I am currently a stay at home mom to my 17 month old son. My former employer would like me to come back to work one or two days a week. The problem is that we just adopted our son a couple months ago, and I am not ready to go back, even for a day or two. Truth be told, I am really enjoying our time together. My aunt lives across the street, I have a few friends in town that are stay at home moms, and my parents live right up the street. I also really like being able to cook, keep the house clean, and spend one on one time with our son. That said, am I being selfish by having my husband be the sole provider? I know he has said before that he thinks I have the more difficult job, but I still feel guilty. |
| Posted by Tina on 08/06/2008 01:48 PM
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
I would say do what you think is right for yourself and your family. If you are happy and content staying at home, don't work. If not go back to work. Work will always be available when your son is older depending on your field. No one can tell you what the right answer is, only you know in your heart whether or not you want to go back. Your son will do well with whatever answer you choose. Good Luck.
I am not a stay at home mom if that helps and I choose not to. I love my career as much as my son and I am not willing to give it up. But if I loved staying home I would. |
| posted by Dr. Cai... on 08/06/2008 02:24 PM
|
|
|
|
|
| If you still feel guilty about staying home and not working maybe look into working from home! There's TONS of things to do from home out there, just be careful and make sure they have a great rep and are registered with the BBB!! Good luck with everything and if I can help with anymore let me know! :) *BIG hugs! Oh and congradulations on becoming a new mom just a few months ago. Adopting is something most people would consider a HUGE challange depending on your situation! Awesome!! |
| posted by Crystal on 08/06/2008 02:50 PM
|
|
|
|
|
| Hi Tina! When I read this post, I just had to reply. I am a stay at home mom with twin toddler girls and we are expecting again in November. That being said, you really do need to follow your heart. If you feel absolutely content and fulfilled staying home with your son, than you have an absolute right to do that and you are not being selfish at all. When you are ready to go back, you will know it is time. Plus, you just adopted your son a couple months ago and this time with him is so precious. My mom was a stay at home mom from the time we were born until my youngest brother went to college... she did not want to miss a heart beat with us.... and now she is going back to school and finishing her degree. But she always reminds me how we will not get these years back, so enjoy every moment you have!! And when you are ready to go back to work, part time or full time, go! Every mom is different, and when you are happy doing what you are doing, your whole family will benefit, whether that is going to work or staying at home! Take Care & God Bless You! Peace, Colleen |
| posted by colleen on 08/06/2008 07:51 PM
|
|
|
|
|
Tina, I consider you to be a very lucky woman. You have the option of either going back to work or staying home with your son. I wish I had those options. I have a 10 month old daugher at home, and I've been trying to find a way for me to be at home with her instead of going to my full-time job every day. Working a couple days a week may be a good compromise for you, but if you're not comfortable, you should stay home with your child. It's a difficult decision to stay at home or to work. Both will have it's drawbacks. But you should do what feels right to you, and what you think is best for you and your family.
Good luck!!! |
| posted by Katie on 08/06/2008 08:15 PM
|
|
|
|
|
I worked from home and still quit my job. But what is right for one is not always right for another, as I am sure you know. I worked for a brain surgeon and when I was trying to decide what I wanted to do he told me that only I know what is best for my family. And, of course, that is sooo true.
There is no reason to feel guilty. You are taking care of, teaching, and helping your son grow. I know it is hard not to feel guilty, I did for a little while, but I talked to my husband about it and he said the same thing. I have it harder than he does. And of course he had to tell me this several times before I really beleived that this is how he felt.
But the best advice is really think about it and listen to your heart, no one else, just your heart.
|
| posted by Kim on 08/07/2008 04:22 AM
|
|
|
|
|
| Thank you all so much! I really appreciate the advice. This is the best site ever!! It is so nice to be able to talk to other moms. I think for now I will follow my heart and devote my time to my son. If I didn't then I think I would really regret it. Thanks Again!!! |
| posted by Tina on 08/07/2008 12:22 PM
|
|
|
|
|
| I personally am happy to hear that you decided to stay home. I agree that you will never get this time back and I don't know anyone that would not give anything to be there for every minute. Us moms that do have a choice to stay home are VERY lucky, and I feel it should not be taken for granted. I don't know if you like country music, but Trace Adkins song, "Your gonna miss this" says it all. |
| posted by Kim on 08/08/2008 12:39 AM
|
|
|
|
|
| I will have to check that song out! I just talked to my old boss today and told her I would not be back. She was very supportive and said that when I was ready she would love to have me back. My husband was really supportive too. Thanks again for all the supportive feedback!! I really appreciate it!! |
| posted by Tina on 08/08/2008 04:51 PM
|
|
|
|
| |
| |
|
|
|
| |  |
| |
|
|
|
