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Hi Jenese,
You know, I never worked for a corporate company, or made much money before, but I still know what you mean. Let me reassure you, however, that what you are doing is making a difference, and you will begin to see some of the evidence of your efforts as your baby grows. I don't know how old your baby is, but I know that for me, the first few months was so hard because there was no responsiveness from my baby, and yet it seemed like I was working so hard! But now that my baby is a bit older, it feels like payday when she's smiling or laughing or hugging me, or learning new things. So hang in there, and with time it will get a little better! |
| posted by Jaclyn on 05/13/2008 02:17 PM
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| just relax don't rush everything not everything needs to be done right that minute you need to take your time and spread the chores out throughout the week and spend as much time as you can with your kids I don't always do the dishes everyday that would cut into my time with my oldest and my kids are more important to me than dirty dishes |
| posted by judi on 05/13/2008 02:23 PM
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| Thanks Jaclyn.....I do understand what you are saying about the "rewards" they definately are my "pay days" My baby is 11 mths and I also have a 3 older children 11,13 and 14. I find it hard to get the energy to do anything. My baby had colic pretty bad as a young infant. She would scream for 6 - 8 hrs a day. I do have good days, but I guess lately it has just been hard for me. I look around and my house isn't as clean as it could be since I am here all day doing nothing (so to speak) but when I have a moment or a nap break....I want that to be MY time not time to clean or pick up after everyone else. I rarely ever get a break just for me. I feel like even moms need adult time or self time. |
| posted by Jenese on 05/13/2008 02:25 PM
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| My older daughters both have a chore a day. One day one of them does dishes and the others dust, sweeps or does the bathroom or something. They alter chores and alter days, so that helps a lot. I guess I just feel as though I am not doing enough......not to mention how frustrating it can be in between those smiles and "mamas" and "dadas" |
| posted by Jenese on 05/13/2008 02:29 PM
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| I am going through the same thing right now. I have joined a gym which offers a hugh aray of childrens activities plus a child center where they can go while you have alone time working out or swiming or to simply get your hair done. I have tried going to the same park in hopes to meet another SAHM, but still no luck. Let me know if you find the answer. :) |
| posted by Tricia on 05/13/2008 03:00 PM
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| How old is your baby? I also am joing the international moms club. My sister said that is what saved her as a SAHM. Do you live near Peoria? |
| posted by Jenese on 05/13/2008 03:08 PM
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Hi Jenese,
I had a hard time adjusting and all I ever WANTED was to be home!
You may not be supporting your family financially in the traditional sense but, of course, you being home frees money that would have otherwise been spent on someone else raising your children and experiencing the first steps and the first words etc . . .
Why not focus on managing the household more efficiently? If you aren't MAKING money, maybe you can SAVE money? That's what I did and really, anyone can use some more cash.
Just a thought.
Anyway, welcome to the site!
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| posted by Melissa on 05/13/2008 03:28 PM
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Hi Jenese,
I have been a sahm for 6 years this month now and even though it can be depressing, there are always other moms to help you out.
When my kindergartener was born, I thought I was going to go nuts, but what helped me out immensely was to start a business(a few) and even though it didn't work out, it was MOMMIES' time. Am looking into yet another mom group..hope it works out...don't like the cliques....
Furthermore, we just moved from urban to suburban Renton, WA and it is not easy to make friends... |
| posted by Amanda on 05/13/2008 07:29 PM
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Hi Jenese,
Some suggestions I have would be to check out mom support groups in your area, MOP(mothers of preschoolers), moms clubs(http://www.internationalmomsclub.org), look into some home businesses that include being able to take your little ones with you(if you need a list, just ask and I will email them to you), furthermore...get help as much as you can because isolation is not good for you or your little one, get out and meet others who are moms just like you and want to start a genuine relationship.
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| posted by Amanda on 05/13/2008 07:32 PM
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Hey Amanda,
Could you email that list of home businesses that allow children to be brought along to me? you can send it through here or melissa.sabol@gmail.com.
Thanks so much! |
| posted by Melissa on 05/13/2008 09:42 PM
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| You're absolutely right, about needing time out for yourself. And be sure to take it! However you can, make sure you get a bit of time out each week! Otherwise, you will go crazy. I also wanted to tell you something that my husband heard this past week. He was listening to news radio, and they were discussing how much money a SAHM "earns" by everything she does. The number was something like $117,000. So aside from all the emotional and developmental benefits of staying at home with your children, you're still making a financial contribution to your home! |
| posted by Jaclyn on 05/13/2008 11:23 PM
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| Amanda I would love a copy of that list. I have looked online and I only find fake fraud home based employment. My email is bojorquez2005@aol.com. THANKS! I have looked in to several "mom clubs" there are none in my area. They say I can start my own chapter.....I am looking into that. I did see on the news that salary.com says the average SAHM should earn just over $116K and the avg working mom somewhere around $60K. |
| posted by Jenese on 05/14/2008 10:30 AM
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| Amanda I would like that list of businesses too my email is poeticmom76@yahoo.com |
| posted by judi on 05/14/2008 01:12 PM
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| I live in Michigan. I have a four year old son and am seven months pregnant with a girl. I have no idea what I am going to do when there are two to chase after. I guess we all just figure it out. The age difference is what worries me, because they will be interested in different things. I'm sure you went throught that too! I read somewhere that you can find playgroups in your area at meetup.com. Once the baby is born, I'm going to look into it. |
| posted by Tricia on 05/14/2008 02:21 PM
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| that is how old my oldest was when my son was born but if you let your 4yrold participate you might be surprised at how well he takes it that he has a younger sibling |
| posted by judi on 05/14/2008 04:20 PM
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| There's a little saying i tell myself when I feel like I'm about to lose it. "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming, what do we do we swim" Those moms out there who have watched Nemo a billion times, you know what I'm talking about. |
| posted by Emily on 05/15/2008 03:06 PM
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