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| First Time Moms |
| Public online group |
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| I try to stay very consistant with my 3yr old daughter but it is hard for me to discipline her in public because people stare at you and make rude comments about correcting your kid but then if you don't correct them they are rude about that too. It seems the more I take my little girl out in public the more she acts up and I often wonder if she has inherited her fathers selective hearing. |
| Posted by Stephanie on 03/11/2008 11:43 AM
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| I would say to continue to discipline her in public. Don't worry about the rude comments or stares. I'm sure there are just as many who are looking on with empathy because they have been in the same situation. Besides, it is none of their business how you discipline your child. As long as it is not abuse, everyone has the right to discipline in their own way. I myself believe in spankings and if my son every acts up in public(he is only 15 months now so we have not come into that stage yet) he will get his butt beat. I'm not sure what kind of acting up she is doing but there may be something about the situation that is causing it. If she is used to getting something from the store everytime you go, and then suddenly does not get it, that could cause it(not saying that is it, just as an example). As far as the selective hearing, I do think there is such a thing in that people can block out certain things that they do not want to hear. I would suggest to just make sure you assert yourself as the parent when in public and make sure she understands that she is not going to get away with acting up. If she has a special place that she wants to go, but you need to do something first, and she acts up, tell her you will not go to her special place if she acts up, then follow through with it. It's better to nip it in the bed, then let it continue to the point where there is no controling her. |
| posted by Casey on 03/11/2008 12:49 PM
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| thank you for your reply but that is what i have been trying yet it still continues and is frustrating. when she was younger it was so much easier than it is now i hope she grows out of this stage. |
| posted by Stephanie on 03/15/2008 09:30 PM
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My mom used to do something to me that worked when I was little...she used to quietly whisper her "rules" in my ear in a voice that meant business (she would grit her teeth and talk through them...when I heard that, I knew she was serious). She would say something like, "Stop screaming right now." It was the tone of voice that did it for me...and because it was quiet, no one around her knew that she was actually disciplining me...
She also used to pinch me, but that's besides the point...LOL. |
| posted by FirstTimeMommy on 03/17/2008 09:44 AM
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| i think the saying is nip it in the bud...not bed..lol |
| posted by Rebecca on 03/17/2008 10:24 AM
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| lol, yeah, nip it in the bud, not bed. typo on my part. |
| posted by Casey on 03/17/2008 02:29 PM
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"father's selective hearing"..haha!!
Ditto on not worrying about what other people think...I know it's hard, though, to not think about it.
I believe in consistency, immediacy, and clarity. Try pre-emptive strikes before going into the store. My mother would give us our boundaries very clearly as to how we were to behave and if we pushed it, out we went and home without whatever it was she was getting. It didn't matter. Our obedience was more important than that gallon of milk or loaf of bread that could be picked up later. And she was clear about the consequences and ALWAYS followed through.
My son is only 18 months and hasn't really acted up in public...so, I only pray I can be as tough as she was!
Hang in there...I appreciate a firm, loving, gracious parent in public more than an impulsive, angry, wimpy one any day!
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| posted by Kelly on 03/22/2008 10:28 PM
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| Kelly...that's a good way to describe some parents when it comes to discipline....wimpy. I agree completely, too. I'd rather see a parent teaching their kid discipline in public, than one who lets their kid walk all over them... |
| posted by FirstTimeMommy on 03/22/2008 11:56 PM
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