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| I have the best little 4 month-old baby girl in the world. But in the last week or so she has started what I think is separation anxiety. This is especially strange to me because I work out of home, but with the ice storm and a round of rotavirus, we've been home together since December 8th. This precious girl has never been much of a crier or a screamer. She didn't cry when she was born. She doesn't cry when she wakes up in the middle of the night to eat. She mainly fusses- because she's hungry or has a wet diaper or something. Basically- I've been spoiled. But now she is crying almost every time I'm not at least touching her. She doesn't even want Grandpa holding her any more. She cries like crazy, but stops the second I take her from him. She cries when I'm two feet away from her. She got these great toys for Christmas (rainforest jumperoo, around we go exersaucer...) and now she won't spend any time in them unless I sit in the floor right beside her, and sometimes not even then. It's not good enough that I'm in her line of sight. I'm only getting to type this now because she's in her swing right next to me- asleep. I am a VERY sensitive mother. I sobbed all the way to work every day the first week I had to take her to daycare. If she does this next week when I have to start dropping her off again, I'll go insane. It'll break my heart into a million pieces. Not to mention the fact that I'm not getting anything done around here since I can't leave her side for a minute. I really just needed to vent this out to people who would understand. But if anyone has any advice or suggestions, I would love to hear them. |
| Posted by Kristi on 12/29/2007 12:13 PM
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Hi Kristi,
I sympathize with you, my 4 1/2 month old daughter is behaving the same way right now. Perhaps it's something to do with reaching the 4 month mark? I also think there's a link to when she had her vaccinations a couple of weeks back - was your baby recently vaccinated too by any chance?
Emma's never been a crier either, but recently she won't let me out of her sight, even when I try to distract her by putting her in her doorframe jumper or in her around we go exersaucer (Santa gave out a lot of those this year, I guess!).
I'm a SAHM, and as my family all live in NZ we only have one trusted babysitter that we let take care of her very occasionally. As a result, I think she has become used to having me around constantly, and can't deal with it if I slip out of sight.
I firmly believe that TV is not a babysitter, however sitting Emma in front of Blue's Clues or Sesame Street for a few minutes is the only way I get to the bathroom sometimes. I also try putting on a kid's CD, singing along for a while, then trying to slip out of the room while the CD is still playing. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. My husband is out of the house for 12 hours each weekday, so I have to try and find time to get laundry done or cook dinner at some point!
I pretty much take Emma around the house with me, sometimes in the baby bjorn for short spells, and sometimes she's content in a bouncy chair or swing as long as she's right next to me. Luckily, she stills wants to nap in her crib, so I get a little time to myself here and there.
I know it's hard, and I'm looking for answers too! Hang in there, I wish you luck! |
| posted by Chris on 12/29/2007 10:24 PM
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| I know exactly how you feel. My son is 20 months old now but at four months old he was the exact same way. I was working full time even and when I was home with him all he wanted me to do was hold him. It was so bad that I had to put him in his swing turn it on along with the music and lights on it and cart him from room to room with me as I did laundry and dishes and cooked and cleaned. I even had to bring him into the bathroom with me when I showered or the other. He even slept with me at night. I was at the point where I was in tears almost everyday and close to a mental break down. I started putting music on for him, classical and children's music and giving him things to chew on like the interlocking rings and cold or frozen teething rings. He never cared to suck on a pacifier but he did like to chew on it. He liked things with different textures and shapes. Every now and again I would turn on a children's show, and he seemed interested in that due to the colors and music in them. Which gave me a few minutes of quiet to calm down. When I was calmed down I would set him down with me on the sofa and play with him. Little tickling games or kissing games(which he still loves) reading to him and showing him pictures. Playing with his toys with him since he was a little young to understand what to do. I didn't last forever, thank goodness, but it did feel like it. I would suggest giving her things she can hold and chew on with different textures try things with music or lights. She might even be teething, just because she isn't showing any bumps on her gums or drooling like crazy doesn't mean anything. My son never did that, he just chewed like crazy and complained. There is something very soothing about mommy to a baby that can make pain seem much less significant to a child so she may be uncomfortable. If you haven't tried solids with her yet I would. My son started on them at about 3 or 4 months and sometimes he was just really hungry for something other than a bottle. I hope this helps. Take care and good luck. |
| posted by Kimberly on 12/31/2007 09:36 AM
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My daughter acted about the same way from 5.5 to a little after 7 months. She is 7.75 months now and things are much better, but she still needs me closer then she used to. Her onset was during a bad bout with a cough and ear infection. She had to be right with me any time I was home (I am also a working mom). She had been sleeping through the night, but started waking in the middle of the night and refusing to go back in her crib.
Try a sling! When she is in the sling we are both happy and I can get a little more done. Then she seems to be a little more willing to hang out alone if she has had a bit of sling time. We also just bring her to bed after she wakes in the middle of the night now. That way we all get sleep.
I can tell you that the last few weeks are better and I hope they get better for you too. |
| posted by Celeste on 12/31/2007 05:28 PM
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Hi Kristi,
I just found the following article about separation anxiety on babycenter.com, it might have some helpful advice for you:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_separation-anxiety_145.bc
Good luck! |
| posted by Chris on 01/01/2008 02:35 PM
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