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| Stay at Home Moms |
| Public online group |
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| My brother and his girlfriend are having a baby in January. She has 2 older kids and does not want a baby shower but wants gifts. They have registered at 2 places. I am in charge of letting people know they need stuff and was wondering if I could pull this off without seeming rude? |
| Posted by K on 09/26/2007 05:11 PM
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| I think you would have to have a shower; I mean, you provide the refreshment and a few games & they get to watch you open the presents they thought long and hard over -- it's something you can't get away from. If she wants the gifts she has to give them something, so to speak. My sisters did some games & had light snacks & a few cocktails --- maybe if you made it seem less baby shower-sh and more party-ish then she'd be okay w/ it! |
| posted by Rochelle on 09/26/2007 05:26 PM
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| Yes, I agree. You need to have some sort of party otherwise is seems rude. Just make it fun and simple. And remember, the other children should not be left out. They should also get a gift to open. It makes them feel special and not left out. |
| posted by on 09/26/2007 06:51 PM
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| People are definitely going to think its rude if you go soliciting for gifts without a party. Only if someone asks if they need anything then you can tell them where they are registered, otherwise you have to have some sort of get together. |
| posted by Brooke on 09/26/2007 08:45 PM
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| You should have a baby shower if they want gifts. It doesn't have to be the traditional kind with games and cutsie things. Just provide some food and drinks, and have a baby shower type cake. |
| posted by Kara on 09/26/2007 11:03 PM
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| Me I would think it is rude to ask for gifts but oh dont come over we just want gifts. Try to explain to her that you do not want to be the one in that position. If she ants gifts then you are planning something light. |
| posted by Natasha on 09/26/2007 11:13 PM
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| I agree with everyone else and say that if she wants and expects gifts, then she needs to have a baby shower. Most people only have a shower for their first child, but if it's been a while I have known people to have another because it's like starting over and they don't have all the gear that a new baby requires. Just keep it simple and low key and maybe the older siblings can help. I have never known of anyone that would actually register in a store, but not think that they had to have a party. What was she thinking? |
| posted by Amy on 09/27/2007 09:23 AM
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| She is having a difficult time being social with this pregnancy. I don't expect people to respond well to this. They are totally anti-baby shower. It is so sad, I had sooooo much fun at mine... Thank you all for commenting and if you all think of some miracle cure for this let me know. This is really hard for me. |
| posted by K on 09/27/2007 11:35 AM
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I guess I somewhat disagree with everyone on this topic.
While it's probably not good for them to expect too much from people, I think you sending an e-mail around to people informally about the registry or mentioning to people that she's not up for a party shouldn't hurt. If they want to send something they can. If not, they won't. Why does everything need to be formal to be accepted? If I heard that they were registered and I was close to them, I'd probably send something w/ a card.....why not. It's a happy time and time to celebrate, instead of worrying about formalities. I would be upset if I didn't get a thank you though. |
| posted by Andrea on 09/28/2007 06:42 PM
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| Thank you Andrea! I really needed an ok from someone. I am in this situation and it's not going away and I need a bit of encouragement. I am not too comfortable with it myself! |
| posted by K on 09/30/2007 08:50 PM
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