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| Support Group for Working Moms |
| Public online group |
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| Hi, all
I needed to have a moment to vent - I'm on complete overload. My house is currently an absolute mess; it looks like a storm blew through. I'm recently came down to 24 hrs per week at work (down from 32 due to budget cut - effective as of this month), and have been working per diem at my parish since September as the interim music ministry coordinator, as we currently do not have a director. I barely had time to keep it all together beforehand, but the one day cut at work is giving me the opportunity to take care of my home (ie, sort out the clutter). The feeling of relief was incredible. But, now my husband is on my case about needing to look at ways to make up the difference from the salary cut I was given at work. He's also annoyed that, in the one free day I've had since my hours were changed, I did not sort out the huge mess in our house. I hollared at my kids today for not picking up their rooms, but I can't even contain the chaos in our downstairs. I know this is only temporary (the mess), but damn... And my mom is on my case about needing to take vacation days from work so I can clean. But, that means having less vacation time where I can actually do that ridiculous thing called "relax" and enjoy being with my family. I tried saying that to her, but was given her AlAnon statement of "when you're in pain, then you'll change", which was followed by, "you just have to clean. That will solve everything." Can anyone else relate??
Megan |
| Posted by meg on 01/16/2016 04:26 PM
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| Dear Meg,
Your family cannot possibly expect you to uphold that household all by yourself. You are a loving spouse, mom and daughter, not a servant! I am sorry about your income issues...I know how hard that is. I also know what it takes to run a household. You cannot do it alone!!! You must sit down with your husband and children. You have to tell them what you can manage and what needs to be done. In a calm, loving manner, you have to DELEGATE! Figure out what tasks they can each handle and tell them they must step up to the plate.
As for your mom, seems to me she doesn't need to be part of this. In fact, it may make your life easier if you don't share family matters with her. Show her you love her by being kind, but she doesn't need to know everything, just as much as you need your sanity. She's not helping so don't reach out to her for emotional help or support. At least not until you feel confident about you home.
I hope this makes sense. I have faith in you and every mom out there that they can work with their families, not against them! |
| posted by Robin on 01/17/2016 07:33 PM
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