Hi, just needing to vent, I apologize in advance. I'm a single mom of a preschooler, 7 months pregnant with another. I'm originally from out of state. I moved here with my husband when he was active duty. I have no family/friends here. I finally got the nerve to leave my husband late last year, found out I was pregnant afterwards. For a little while I was hoping that someway somehow we'd work things out for our family, but he...let's just say stuck a fork in us. I have my reasons for not wanting to go back "home". I work fulltime/overtime barely making ends meet, living in a tiny place I'm not too proud of. He's been unemployed for over a year now, and makes more money than I do with his GI Bill and unemployment, living in the nice 2 bedroom we used to share. He 'babysits' our daughter a few hours every few days. When I ask her what they do she says she watches him play video games the whole time. I get so envious of him having the opportunity to spend the day with her and he doesn't take advantage. Yet, she yearns for him. I feel like I do not compare to Daddy no matter what I do. Next week I go back to court to finalize the divorce. I thought I've been doing ok, but just thinking about it makes me feel like he's ripping my heart apart again. Why am I struggling and being miserable, while he's having the time of his life? I tried to make it work for years, and he goes completely unpunished for all the hurt and pain he caused us. I know I may sound crazy, but I have no one to talk to. I've bottled this up for so long and it's like word vomit now. There are days when I feel optimistic, proud, accomplished...then days that I don't even wanna wake up and face the world. Where I feel ashamed of the life I've made for us and just wanna curl up in a ball and cry. Throw my hands up and give up, just runaway from everything. These pregnancy hormones are probably making things feel 10 times worse. I know that things could always be worse...I just feel pathetic today. Sorry again.

I am a single mom of a 9 year old daughter. I've done an amazing job raising her and I still feel pretty soft as a person-the whole thing hasn't hardened me like I see out of so many single parents. I've been dating this guy for about 7 years off and on and feel so very connected to him on so many levels.As of recent he told me he wanted everything (us,family,kids, marriage). I believed him! A month ago I couldn't have been happier when we found out we were having a baby.We had even started talking about having a home birth. Now at 8 weeks pregnant he just told me to raise the kid on my own. I am kind of freaking out here and very heartbroken but trying to remain calm at the same time. This was a planned pregnancy. I do not want to do the single parent thing all over again. I really don't think he is coming back but even if he does I don't think I'll be able to look at him the same way. We have such an adorable relationship and i don't understnd why he ran. But now I've seen his character and it repulses me. I try to send out loving thoughts to my now ex guy because i have know idea why he has done this to us or what he is feeling. I haven't even told anyone I'm pregnant because I am trying to protect him from what my family and friends will inevitably think of him for doing this to us,that will not be able to be reversed.But time is running out. I can't even begin to think about what i'm going to do. Sorry i can't offer any advice right now but i did want to reach out because I know how you feel. I feel like everything is screwed up!