Ok so please bear with me because this is probably going to sound so paranoid and stupid but I need opinions outside my own and you have all been very honest with me before. My husband has a new female co-worker and they work closely together six days a week. I am not usually the jealous type at all and I am ok with him having female friends with boundaries of course. I was totally comfortable with this situation until he started coming home and in casual convo mentioned some stuff she had said to him....Did I mention he is her boss? Anyway she brought up one day a conversation she had with another female in the office about how charming and sweet he is and what a hot body he has. Of course he was flattered and who wouldnt be right? Anyway this comment didnt bother me per say but what bugs me is why this conversation came up and who tells their boss "yea me and the girls were talking and your hot"? Especially after a week of working together? That is completely unprofessional to me. He also said that a guy at the spot his crew frequents for lunch everyday asked if they were married and my response was why would they think you were married to which he replied I dont know stupid i guess. Ok so I am feeling kinda insecure at this point but trying so hard to hide it. Then we were going to have a super bowl party and he invited the guys on his crew and I mentioned inviting her because I thought it would be a great opportunity for me to meet her and get to know her and hopefully put my insecurities behind me. He said no because he was afraid hanging out with a female co-worker might be awkward just because he did not know her that well and didnt want anything misconstrued at work since none of the guys were coming. Then I find out they were texting each other during the game. They were innocent texts abbout the game but it struck me as odd because first he had told me what he did earlier about keeping things professional and second he did not tell me they were texting at all. She texted him at 11:30 at night and when I went to silence his phone so it wouldnt wake up our kids I saw it was her. I mentioned that he got a text the next morning and he never said who it was which he usually does. So as psycho as this may be I looked and it was her and they had texted a few times during the game. I know I am being so paranoid and I do trust my husband but I just worry about the level of professionalism and they work together such long hours that I dont want things to get out of hand. Also a couple of years ago he had a female co-worker that he became good friends with but only hung out in a group with and I met her and stuff but one night at the bar among a group of his friends without me there tried to kiss my husband. He didnt tell me until months afterwards because he was scared I would think he did something wrong. A friend of mine confirmed he did nothing wrong but could I just be projecting that situation here? I know it is a total double standard (which I hate) but I dont care that his male co-workers text or call him and send him funny texts and jokes but it is driving me crazy that she is doing it. I guess too I am of the mindset that a man and woman who are in relationships with other people should not be hanging out one on one together or texting/talking on a personal basis unless the significant others know about it and have met that person and are comfortable with it. Especially if they already spend more time together at work than with their partners....right?  I feel so confused and like I am being silly and I want to talk to my husband about it but I am afraid he will take it wrong or like I am accusing him. I just know that I dont want to become paranoid or consumed with this but I am kinda getting there. Am I just being jealous or am I justified? Please any advice is welcome!!

Kris I think you are justified to She may be overstepping her boundries and you should def voice your opinion to your husband or just keep a mental note of the going ons between them. It seems a little sketchy to me and if I were in your shoes I would let it be known I wasn't impressed. I get the feeling you are none to pleased about the situation. I think if you trust him things should be fine but you should let him know how it makes you feel when she texts him and takes things to an unprofessional level....

this is just my opinion, which is worth as much as a fart in the wind, but i think you are totally justified! i was in a semi similar situation with my ex husband. he had a "friend" at work. they began to get close with things like you mentioned (texting, etc.) long story short, they ended up sleeping together. when i found out, he still denied and i decided to leave with my 2 children. he moved her into our house the very same night. you know him better than anyone else, and you also know yourself best! just keep your eyes and ears open, listen to your heart. your husband may be totally innocent, but the real point is that this woman is totally out of place and something should be said about it! if you need to talk or vent, feel free to contact me anytime. you are in my thoughts and prayers! i wish you all the best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

P.S. Chevonne I am so sorry for what happened to you! I have had it done to me in a past relationship and so has my husband. That is something that I believe should never happen whether it be a husband or wife that is unfaithful. I applaud you for taking control of your life and I hope that you and your children are able to move on succesfully and peacefully. If you ever need or want to chat or just vent I am here for you!! Take care!!

thanks kris! at first i was extremely sad, then realized how much of a favor he did me! he doesn't even bother with the boys, and he was carriying on with all this while i was pregnant with his 2nd. you know, you may not realize it while in the moment, but sometimes you have to get rid of garbage to make room for the new things! i hurt for about 2 yrs. and was then able to move on with my life. i am remarried now, just had a son and my husband treats my children better than their father ever did! i finally get to feel what it's like to be valued for what i'm worth as a mother and a wife! how amazing!!!! and i completely agree with raven's mommy! beautiful job handling the situation kris!!! i applaud you!!!! please remember how strong and intellegent you are and we are here to support each other! again, i'm super proud of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

:) XOXOXO :)