HI IM KIM I JUST NEED TO VENT LEAVE ME FEEDBACK IF U WOULD LIKE OK HERE GOES... OK SO IM MARRIED AND HUBBY WORKS IM A SAHM WE JUST HAD ANOTHER BABY IN OCTOBER OF 09 HE WONT EVEN TAKE CARE OF HER I ASK HIM TO HOLD HER WHILE I DO STUFF AND HE WILL HOLD HER FOR LIKE 5 MINS THEN TRY TO MAKE UP SOME KIND OF EXCUSE WHY HE CANT HOLD HER NO MORE I CANT STAND THAT NOT TO MENTION HE GETS ON ME IF THE HOUSE GETS MESSY BUT IM JUST TO BUSY TAKIN CARE OF THE KIDS TO CLEAN 24/7 I DONT GO NO WHERE BC I DONT HAVE A CAR AND I DONT WORK AND IVE LOST ALL MY FRIENDS BC I LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE MY CLOSEST NEIGHBOR IS LIKE 5 FOOTBALL FIELDS AWAY ITS DRIVIN ME INSANE WE NEVER DO ANYTHING ANYMORE BC WHEN HE GETS HOME ALL HE WANTS TO DO IS SLEEP WHAT ABOUT ME WHEN AM I EVER GONNA GET TO JUST SLEEP

wow hun! you really do need to vent! you poor thing! :( please email me so even if you are not close, we can become friends online! vonnie1999@yahoo.com

i can't wait to hear from you and welcome the email! :) stay well until then!

Having a new baby in the house can make other tasks difficult.  As time goes on, it will get easier.  I remember when I had my second child my husband also used to complain that the house wasn't clean enough and that I used to bitch about everything.  I realized that the first year would be a challenge, and that I needed to relax, and focus on taking care of the baby.  Things around the house would get done while my kids were in bed or naptime.  Now, my boys play together and I can get more done.  I also go to playgroups like the library.  I still wish I had more time to do other things around the house or hang out with friends, but I realize that I will never get this time back, so I do as much as I can with the kids.  Sometimes it's hard because I also really don't have time to hang out with friends, but I do have family members that come over.  If you need to talk, I'm also here.

Girl I can totally relate! Something similar happened to me after I had my second baby. It was like my husband just shut down and would stay gone a lot. I talked to a relationship counselor about it and they said that men deal with stress and changes much differently than women usually. He may just be under stress and doesnt know how to express it or doesnt feel comfortable expressing that is he is not super emotional. I would try talking to him. Tell him how you are feeling and that you need help and things feel distant. Try not to be accusatory but just tell him your feelings and ask him if he has been feeling distant or stressed out too. Hopefully he will talk to you about it and you two can figure it out but if not maybe get someone else (a neutral party) involved to help mediate. I really hope things get better because I know it is stressful having kids and being home all day and no friends and then relationship issues all at once. I was in the same boat and kinda still am in a lot of ways but I talked to my husband and things are gradually getting better. Good luck and take care of yourself!