I am struggling and my therapist recommended that I join a support group for working moms...here I am.  I keep reading that something has to give and you have to let some things go ... but what?  My house looks like a bomb went off, I can barely keep my head above water at work, and my husband is incredibly cranky ... I think because I don't have time for intimacy with him.  I am looking for suggestions ... or maybe for someone to say "Me too".

You should tell your husband that studies show husbands who help out around the house usually get more sex!  Really!  Because you'll have more time to "think" about it.  Usually when I get overwhelmed I tell my husband "It's about time that we discuss what you can do to help me around the house!  I'm doing it ALL again."  He usually sighs and says "ok."  The sigh is due to the fact that most men take what they can get until you explode and THEN help out.  Ugh.  But I made a deal with him  before we were married that I would NOT be the domestic Diva because I wanted to work so:  50/50 baby.  That is the deal. Signed contract (basically) and if broken would be the deal breaker for me.  He agreed and I pull out that (fictional) contract from time to time to remind him that he agreed. 

I'm starting to dole out chores.  Son: (he's 9)  You empty the dishwasher. Honey: You are in charge of keeping the stove clean (because he lets grease get everywhere) and also loading the dishwasher.  I'll work on the rest of the house. (I hate dishes.)  The point is you CAN'T do everything.  So, hit your partner up for some help.  Entice him with the words "Honey, if you help me a lot more around the house, I'll have more time for sex!"

Thanks Savrine - you've made some great points.  I am going to try to be better about delegating instead of just assuming that he sees the same mess that I see.  I've told him that I don't have time for sex because of the household chores and my career ... and he was upset that I implied sex was a chore.  Sometimes it really feels like it is!  Just one more thing to check off of my to do list!

Rae, I have felt similar. 

But I am a single mom who works full time and has a 2.5 year old.  Just recently, I hired a lady to clean my house.  I have her in every other week (I always have the house picked up, but the vacumming and dusting and bathroom cleaning I leave to her).  Granted it is not as often as I would like as I cannot afford much, but every other week seems to work ok for me.  She charges only 15 per hour, so at 2X/month for 2 hours each I am only out 60 bucks/month and I cannot tell you how much stress it has taken off of me.  Now I can spend extra time I may have doing a special project like cleaning out some boxes, or doing the windows and not feel like I am geting no where.  All I can say is that it did wonders for my attitude!

Wonderful idea!  It had crossed my mind but I thought it would be much more expensive than $60 per month.  I could definitely get by with having someone come in every other week.  Thank you so much for your response!