i have been dating my bf for over 4 yrs, and he has full custody of his daughter, plus we have a 2yr old together.  HIS daughter is 10 and pretty much attention-hungry because she had been through some rough times in her life.  anyways, i think i am going crazy here and not sure what to do about it.

there isnt much difference in the relationship he has with me and the one he has with his daughter.  well, the only diffrence is, he and i have sex and they dont (DUH!) but the wrestling, tickling, nicknames, snuggling....its all the same.  he evens uses the same phrases when goofing around like "i should just tickle you right now" and the damn "kissy face" where he kisses my cheek a million times.

i feel so stupid, but i was in search of a meaningful relationship when i met him and honestly only had one serious one before him, which obviously turned bad.  my ex was very controlling and physically abusive a little.  so when i met jason he told me to get ready to be spoiled and blah blah blah.  so not the case.  i know his kid comes first but does he have to treat us the same?????

honestly i wish she would live at her moms so he can focus on me and our daughter more.  when she was gone the last year at her moms i saw a differenc ein how he acted with me and our daughter.  now that she's been back for 3 days already i can see that all out the window.  its like he cant divide his time or love and cant understand that daddies and daughters need a seperate relationship from bf's and gf's.

am i nuts/  should i leave him?  should i try and talk with him (which is always impossible) or maybe try to convince him to send his daughter to live with her mom fulltime?

Ok, I dont know what to say about the tickling, snuggling, nickname thing being the same between you and his daugther. Im wondering how old he is, and maybe if he had her young and possibly hasnt had a whole lot of relationships, he just treats all females the same. He may not know HOW to seperate his affection, and do different things with you than he does with her.

As for you wanting her to go back to her mothers house, I think that is just pure selfish. She is his CHILD, and you should want him to be able to spend time with his daugther. .just as much as you want him to spend time with you and YOUR daughter. He has TWO children. You may only have one, but he should be able to treat both of his daughters the same, without you feeling like your child should get more attention or love.

Ive read all of your posts recently and it really seems like you dont want his daughter there, and maybe this just stems from your dislike from her from the previous experiences you've had with her. . or maybe its just jealously because you want more of his attention on you and your daughter. It doesnt sound like anything that is going to go away without some serious mediation or discussion. You really need to work through your issues with his daughter and make a decision as to whether you will ever be happy with her in his life.