HELP...  Have been training my son for nearly a year.  He started off really good -- 98% of his big business went into the potty.  And, he would let me know either he needed to go do his big business or he had already done it in his diaper; so I could change him.  At times, he was able to hold his pee for hours, esp. during his naps.  But, starting about 3 months ago, all hell broke loose!!!!!!!!!!!  He pooped in the dark; or in a corner; and did not want us to check his diaper.  Forget about letting us know (he does not talk yet) he needs to go or he has finished.  Now, less than 1% of the time he did either business in his potty. 

Any idea, suggestion, comment, ...

I experienced a similar set back with my first son.  I truly believe that I started him too soon.  All was going well and then he started doing the hiding thing.  The truth is that this seems to be something that boys must *choose* to let go of rather than being *forced* to let go of it.  From 18-26 months they seem to hit a very independent phase and there really is no way that you can *make* him do this until he is ready.  We use the "big boys go on the potty" tactic, but at this point he might either not really care if he is a "big boy" or even be scared to be a "big boy".  Reassure him that even when he is using the potty he will always be your baby.  Perhaps you could have something special that you do just you and him for the days he does well.

It also sounds like you are very frustrated at this.  I remember how frustrated I was with my son.  It is important to not get angry with him.  If you find you are having trouble controlling your emotions it might be better to stop for a while and try it again when some time has passed.  If you have already been working on it for a year and he is only 18 months then perhaps he just needs a break.  We are always very excited to get our kids out of diapers, but the truth is that it is not worth the stress.  I never attempt to potty train unless I have many weeks that I know I have nothing major going on so that can be our main focus.

 I have potty trained 3 boys.  The first I started too early and learned the hard way.  It was a long, frustrating battle.  The other 2 I waited until I thought they were ready (one was 3 and one was almost 3) and it took only a matter of weeks with a few minor setbacks.

Good luck and if I can be of any extra help please let me know.

Jade

Thanks, Jade.  I will take your advise in heart.  You are right about the frustration.  Both of us would probably need a break!!!  How long did you give your oldest one the break before you resume the training??

Phyllis-

I honestly can't remember.  When I decided that we needed a break I was pregnant with #3 so I think I waited until life had settled after the new baby before I started again.  Maybe 3-4 months.  But I must say it was much easier the second time around and I was also surprised that he started staying dry through the night almost right away then too.  Hang in there.  I promise you won't be changing diapers forever.

Wow.  You are a SUPERMOM!!!  Your boys are beautiful   Thanks for the advise.  I've been talking with my husband about it.  He seems to think that the little man needs to continue his "potty training"; and I feel like a break.  How do you do it??  Four children -- all boys.  I've only this one and I feel so overwhelmed and exhausted.  He is rather stubborn for his age.  Sometimes, the look on his face tells me that he is just going to keep challenging me and to do exactly what I ask him not to.  Then, other times, he is sweet and is willing to follow instructions like putting things back where they belong; or taking bottles and paper to the recycle bins... How do you do it??

Phyllis-

Just between us moms here, I must say that one of the best decisions I made as a mom was to tell my well-intentioned hubby to back out.  Seriously, he is a great dad, but when it comes to things like potty training they look at it from a whole different perspective.  They think it would be nice not to have to buy diapers any more and think it would be nice for you to not have to change them.  In La La Land all of that would be nice.
YOU however, and the one in the trenches actually getting the job done.  You need to trust your mommy instinct on this.  If DH is giving you a hrad time then politely tell him that you are with him every day and are the one best suited to make these decisions.
My husband of course still pipes up with casual comments like, "He should stop wearing pull ups," but he has no idea what those comments entail.  Do not for a second take them as a personal attack on you.  Just let them roll off and do what you think is best.  Afterall, if he really wants him potty trained he can always take a couple weeks off and do it *his* way. ;-)

(And for those of you SAHD's out there, this has nothing to do with the male/female thing.  I'm merely saying the parent that is home is usually more intune with these things.)

i would talk to your dr first and foremost but i am a nurse and i have to say that i wouldnt worry at all. im rather surprised that you had so much luck with your son over the last year- thats really very early and most children arent even able to control thier bladder and bowels at that young of an age (although its not unheard of). its also not unheard of for your child to start off potty traning well- my son 20mnths started potty training on his own- but then for them to revert back- which my son also did. i would just take that as a sign that hes not quite ready. dont get me wrong im not telling you to give up, keep at it, keep encouraging him, but dont push him too hard. children have a wide range of times when they may be ready (often times boys take longer than girls) they could potty train anytime from 9 mnths to 4 years old and night time training is even harder. so just take a deep breath, relax, keep doing what your doing and when your son is ready youll know it!