I have a 9 month old little boy and a very childish husband. I am a stay at home mom and do a lot during the day. My husband son and I moved in with my dad about 6 months ago so we could afford for me to stay home and raise our son. My husband works 2 pm to 10:30 pm and when he comes home he instantly goes for the xbox to play call of duty. until he decides to go to bed. Which most of the time ends up being anywhere from 6 am to 8 or 9 am. He does not help with the laundry he leaves pop cans all over the place plus everything else. I'm tired of being the maid and the only one that takes care of everything.

I've tried explaining to him that I don't sleep well when he plays all night. We live in the basement and our bedroom/ living room/ play area is all in one. Our son has the actual bedroom so he can sleep. Does anyone else have the same problem with their spouses?

I say if you're going to act like a child, you are going to be treated like one. If hubby wants to play video games all night like a 9 yr old, then give him a time limit like a 9 yr old. I would personally say I understand he's tired after working 8 hrs & if he feels this helps relax him then I dont mind him playing, however he should only be "allowed" to play for 45 minutes or an hour. After all, how many phone conversations w/ a girlfriend or movies have we not had to cut short or not have at all because the baby or adult responsibility is calling?  I believe u can catch more flies w/ honey than vinegar, but honestly, as frustrated, tired & sick as I've been lately (baby has been up 2 weeks straight wanting to hang out in the middle of the night, not understanding mommy can't keep running on 3 hrs of sleep-broken in to 3 segmennts), I honestly think the xbox would have mysteriously dissapeared by now. Either that or I would have most likely gone on a rampage and broken it right in front of him (I dont recommend that, just know I would have done it)

I have asked begged pleaded adn bargained to get him to stop playing.I don't mind a couple of hours but when it's all night long. Drives me insane. and I undsertand the lack of sleep April. My son is teething and his wonderful schedule went to hell in a hand basket. I seriously get to do nothing while mys husband gets to do whatever he wants. he plays travel tournament softball adn the season is getting ready to start up. Every weekend he will be playing pretty much. Which means I don't get any time for myself. I am not a single parent. If I had wanted that I would have handed over the check to the divorce lawyer when my husband was being a cheating bastard.

Sorry now I am currently in a crap mood and seriously in need of a girls night out. I'm to the point of tears right now.

I completely understand. I'm at that point too. And you said it perfectly when you said you werent a single parent. I just recently got back w/ my daughters dad (she's 6 months) but prior to that, for over 4 months I was alone. COMPLETELY alone, w/ no one to so much as say "can u hold her for 5 minutes while i go to the restroom"  So it is possible to do it all on your own but you shouldnt have to unless you are alone.  I would straight out ask him if he wants a family or not.  I went through this w/ my daughter's dad. Although I never actually caught him cheating, the phone calls from his ex when I was pregnant didnt exactly make him look good.  He wanted to be out and about like he was when he was single.  It pretty much came down to this "if you want to be single & care free, be single & care fee" When I let him go, he was out & about at first but then for whatever reason (Thank God) realized that's not what he wanted & now he's home & treats me good & is a good dad. The fact of the matter is you can do bad by yourself. What's the point of doing bad w/ the one person who's supposed to make your bad days good?

Oh, and I wanted to add that I'm not saying to just throw your hands in the air & give up on your marriage & family. I am the first to agree that Especially as a female, (since men r usually the ones who are dogs & cheat, act stupid, etc) u should do everything in your power to keep your family together. Learn to forgive, learn to pick your battles, etc etc. But sometimes you just realize maybe 2 people dont want the same thing in life at that time (I dont know if your pregnancy was planned or not, but mine wasnt). So w/ my daughters dad I figured he didnt want to step up & be a man. Give up his old life for a new life w/ me and my child, so I decided to move on w/ out him rather than stick it our miserably & try to change him. As we all know, you cant change a man.  Luckily for me, he changed on his own once he saw I was no longer there. Pray, honestly I believe its what worked for us.

want's to be single just about fits him. But he loves his son. He helps occasionally but it's like pulling teeth. He acts like it's a chore some days. He totally shuts down when I get to the point where I am asking him to help me. I can't do everything. Plus I need a break too. The last time I went out by myself without the baby with my freinds was over 2 months ago. We still have a lot of work to do on our relationship. I literally went through hell while I was pregnant. I am slowly getting back my self confidence. Yes he makes the money but it's our money. Time to stand up for myself.

I relate to the part about not being a gamer, since my husband and I both are gamers. But I do think there is a line that shouldn't be crossed when you become a parent and that gaming needs to be tuned down when you have a family. Have you talked to your father about this? Maybe he could talk to him and if that doesn't work maybe have him turn off the electicity for that part of the house when it is bedtime. Isn't this raising your father's power bill he really needs to be brought into this since this is his house.

I mean I can't relate since I am a gamer. LOL

He actually shut it off around 3 am today. Which is early for him. My dad recieved a $400 electric bill and my husband refuses to believe that it is his xbox that is causing the hike. My dad will not speak to him about it just me. So I get put in the middle. trying to keep the peace is starting to stress me out.

Ok.  Well let me say first that we have 2 xbox's.  Plus a wii and a game cube.  I have 3 kids and a husband that love games and I havent noticed a hike in the electricity bill because of it.  Husband plays for hours on his days off.  I doubt it was the xbox alone that has caused the increase, but rather the addition of 3 new people using lights, heat, hot water, the stove, microwave, television, curling iron, blow dryer, etc. etc.

Beyond that, I would say maybe you should just get up and turn the xbox off after you have had enough.  I play on occasion as well, and its VERY easy to lose track of time.  If hes playing online, he is probably having conversations with his friends and enjoying being in another world.  It really is a nice break from reality!  BUT he shouldnt be running from his responsibility to the xbox.  If you have things you need him to do, ask him before he has a chance to turn it on so atleast he would have helped a little before playing.  Baby steps!  Or coax him away after the baby has gone to bed with a sexy nighty and a few candles!  Remind him what he is missing.  :)