> INSTALLING A HUSBAND
>
> Dear Tech Support,
>
> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
> noticed distinct slow down in overall system performance,
> particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated
flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
>
> In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable
> programs, such as
> . Romance 9.5 and
> . Personal Attention 6.5,
> and then installed undesirable programs such as
> . TVSports 3.2 and
> . Golf Clubs 4.1.
>
> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6
> simply crashes the system..
>
> . Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix
> these problems, but to no avail.
>
> What can I do?
>
> Signed,
>
> Desperate House Wife
>
>
>
> DEAR DESPERATE,
>
> First, keep in mind,
> . Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
> . Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
>
> Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to
> download Tears 6.2
> and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
> . If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should
> then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers
> 3.5.
>
> However, remember, overuse of the above application can
> cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0
or Beer 6.1.
> . Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that
> will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly trojan virus.
>
> Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install
> Mother-In-Law 1.0
> (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually
> seize control of all your system resources..)
>
> In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the
> Boyfriend 5.0 program.
>
These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband
> 1.0.
>
> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does
> have limited memory
> and cannot learn new applications quickly.. You might
> consider buying
> additional software to improve memory and performance. We
> recommend
> . Cooking 3.0 and
> . Hot Lingerie 7.7.
>
> Good Luck
> Tech Support
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