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| I don't think there is such a thing as a "bad" child, just poor parenting skills. |
| posted by Tessa on 02/19/2008 10:36 PM |
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| Children absorb and adapt very well and quickly at a young age. If I see a child acting up, there is only one assumption as to why this is happening. The parents are not reprimanding, teaching, and showing the child how to respect and what will happen if they don't. This is why we have little thugs running around our society now. More and More now parents are trying to be their kids friend rather than the parent that the child needs. Physical violence against the child can sometimes make the child act out more. For the life of me I don't understand these women who whale on their children in public. Can you imagine how devistating that has to be, getting spanked, smacked, and yelled at in public. How embarrassing and horrible for ones phsyche. You need to find that happy medium. |
| posted by Katherine on 02/20/2008 07:57 AM |
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| my actual answer is that the child is being a child. it takes many years to train a child. there is a time and place for training, and i don't think it's appropriate to shame them in public. however, in private, the bad behavior must be discussed and consequences given. when my children 'act up' in public, they get some stern words from me, and they know that we are'nt through dealing with the issue. |
| posted by mmm on 02/20/2008 11:33 AM |
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| If your child is behaving badly it would have to be the parents fault for not teaching them the right way. I'm one of them because my son doesn't always listen to me. |
| posted by Chelle on 02/20/2008 03:14 PM |
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| I agree with Missy to a certain extent. Everyone's kids have their moments in public. It how the parents handle it during those times that makes the difference. Are they just sitting there or are they doing something about it. The older kids get, though, the better they should behave. And we have a habit of wanting to point fingers at other parents for some reason. We don't know the whole story. |
| posted by Erin on 03/01/2008 08:18 AM |
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| Wow, I must be a bad mom. My daughter acts up in public all the time. Doesn't bother me too much, usually. She wants what she wants and will pitch a fit to get it, I will not give in, so I let her have it out where ever we are...guess I am a bad parent. I tell her to stop, and give her the look...I think some kids are just like that. Oh well... |
| posted by Candice on 03/13/2008 06:25 PM |
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| I have to agree with Erin, You don't know the whole story so you can't judge! I have a son that has reasons for acting up. It is neither his fault nor our (parents) fault.I hate when people give you looks like you are doing something wrong! I wish people would mind there own business and not worry about my child when he is crying or throwing a fit. I am so tired of people saying that it is the parents fault for the child acting up. They are kids they are going to act up! There is not a child that is perfect and acts just like they should everytime they leave the house! There is nothing you can do that is going to make your child behave EVERYTIME that you go out! I also hate when people call a child bad. They are NOT bad. They are just having a problem! Sorry for getting so upset, but that is just one of those things I just can't let go. I have a child that people are talking about in this poll so I had to explain it! |
| posted by Kelly on 03/17/2008 08:24 PM |
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| RIGHT ON, KELLY!!! I feel the same way...kids are kids, they cannot behave the way we want them too all the time, and what fun would it be if we only had drones in this world?! |
| posted by Candice on 03/21/2008 12:06 PM |
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Not spanking when it is waranted is a reason that America is turning into a nation of 'yes men' it creats a lack of accountability later in life.
here's my approach:
My (almost 2yo) son likes to try and run away from me in stores and I *TRY* to teach him better by following this order:
1) run after him & quietly tell him "no" in an assertive tone and explain it's bad & someone will steal him.
2) run after him & grab his hand (repeat #1) then firmly hold his hand and have him follow me back to where we were
3) chase after him, smack his but then repeat steps 1 & 2
4) repeat step 3 & cary him around not letting him down until I'm done with my errand (he's 30 pounds)
I don't think his bad behavior is because I'm a bad parent...some kids are just testing their limits...and may be more stubborn about listening...
like when we are at home he knows it's wrong to climb the couch & if I catch him he scampers down and tries to hide from me peeking out at me knowing he was in the wrong. I grab his hand assertively tell him no, he could get hurt then put him in time out. A few days later same story...he's back up on the couch.
my kids are not learning to run away from me or climb on the couch from my behavior...
it's just something he does that is unexceptible...and if anyone has a problem withj me not wanting my son to run away from me in a store or run out into the moving traffic they should mind their own buisiness...it is not up to my child to deside if he wants to be stolen or run over by a car....he doesn't understand those situations...and he will not if I can help it.
I don't want my son stolen or hurt or run over by a car...I will do what ever it takes to prevent that from happening ...if that means spanking...deal with it!
I love my sons & I will keep them safe |
| posted by Melissa on 07/15/2008 02:14 PM |
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| Kids will be kids. Previous to having kids of my own, I would look down on it as the parents not controlling their kids. But having two kids under 2, now I just feel empathy for the mom! I've been there - and it sucks to have strangers giving you the "look" or worst yet asking if you need help when you're trying to calm your screaming kids down in a checkout line that is a mile long! |
| posted by Jess on 09/12/2008 03:52 PM |
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| When children act up in public or any time it's because they are feeling what they perceive as stress. Just because an adult doesn't think the situation is stressful isn't really the point. The fact that your child feels safe enough to act up in front of you means he/she trusts you with his/her feelings and is looking to you for help in dealing with what's going on. The earlier we as parents figure out how to help our children with their stress the better they will behave as they grow up. If parents could stop being embarrassed by these outburst and focus on our children and understand this is a normal learning process the better off we will all be. Let's leave the judgment at the door and allow parents to do what it takes to help their children. They, after all, know them best. |
| posted by Michelle on 11/05/2008 09:34 AM |
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| I think all kids have their own way of expressing how they feel in a certain situation. My kids are normally very well behaved but if there's a ton of people around or if they are hungry or tired they will misbehave and I try to help them with it so I voted for the stress one. |
| posted by Crystal on 11/24/2008 11:47 AM |
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| i didnt vitw becuase I dont think any of these choices fit..sometimes kids will be kids and act up to test their limits! so that is not the parents fault |
| posted by Erica on 02/27/2009 05:02 PM |
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| Wow. I can't believe some of the responses. Do you even have children? If my child throws a fit in public, so what? I don't think it is a reflection on my parenting skills. How i handle the situation? What would you have me do? Beat my child into submission? Bribe them with candy, toys, the like? I don't think so. I will try to fix whatever is stressing them or try reasoning with them, is that even possible with a two year old. If that does not work (i really do try), then i let the tantrum run its course. She is not hurting herself nor anyone else. And, depending on where i am at (i.e. movies, etc) i will remove her so she does not annoy others. Don't expect that of me in the grocery store though, if her behavior bothers you then remove yourself. |
| posted by Loda on 03/14/2009 04:50 AM |
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| Kids will be kids. They have to be shown how to behave the right way. While it's never fully the parents fault or fully the kdis fault, it's a mix of both. Kids have attitudes of their own and will react to situations the way mom or dad does. If your a calm even tempered person I think your child will be the same way. Heaven help society with my daughter! She's only four months old and already loud and silly and high demanding! But she's so much fun! |
| posted by Ashley on 03/18/2009 08:54 AM |
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| I don't agree one way or the other entirely this is like the question of nurture versus nature. There is a balance if it is a child I am around on a continuous basis and see them acting out all the time it is probably a parenting issue. However every child or every person just has those days when they are going to "act out" in a way others see as inappropriate. |
| posted by Amber on 05/28/2012 07:15 PM |
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