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| Blindsided by a Diaper--You are not alone! |
| Hi everybody,
I have loved what everyone has read about the book. I am also reading the book and I LOVE it. I got a little over-excited about reading The Green Book and posted my blog really early, but I took my time a little more with this one. I understand what Marcia was saying about some couples not experiencing a lot of the issues in the book--I know people who seemed to "breeze" through parenthood as well, however I think everyone goes through an adjusting period. The awesome thing about this book for me was that it made me feel like I was not alone. My husband and I were married after 6 months, and pregnant 2 months after that. We didn't intend to be on such a fast track, but it happened none the less. When our little girl was born we were still in such a tender phase of our relationship that we had to learn to define ourselves in relation to our family all over again. I spent many nights crying and thinking that we had it SO hard because of our situation and that other couples who "planned" things out a little better weren't experiencing what we were going through. The great thing about this book was the re-assurance that even couples who had been married for 10 years still experienced some of the things we did.
My husband was never jealous of the baby--in fact, from day 1 he seemed to be more of a natural parent than I was, which kind of made ME jealous! However, after reading this book I now understand more than ever how important it is to make time for eachother. It is SO easy to put the baby to bed and just lay on the couch and do your thing, without really interacting with eachother. This was the most important aspect of the book for me, along with some of the male essays about how men view the whole process. It is so true about men growing with the baby--they learn right along with the baby and it's so important to nurture both of them through the process no matter how much you don't want to sometimes. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about!! :)
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| See also: diapers, relationships, baby |
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| Answers: |
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Briana, you make a good point about these types of problems affecting couples who have been together a long time vs a short time. I think being together longer can make it harder in some ways. You get used to things being a certain way and it's hard to change. The longer you have had those habits, the harder it is to change them.
My husband and I definitely went through an adjustment period. The big difference between us and the couples in the book was how it was handled. Since I met my husband, talking things out immediately has been standard procedure. I can't stand holding things in, and I can't stand it when he does it. He is the same way. I think that is why I had a hard time relating to the people in the book. I just kept thinking "Talk to her about it," or "Tell him how you feel." I am a huge advocate of talking things through. |
| posted by Marcia on 06/21/2007 |
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