They have no choice -

They have no choice

As children they do not have the option to say "no I dont want to." If you falter from teaching them that they have to do what is required of them it will haunt them later in life when they have homework or a job to go to. If you are firm in your decision then they will soon learn that it is in their best interest to say "yes ma'am" and do what is asked of them. Time outs only go so far the older they get. The more you hinder their "play" time the worse it gets. There are other ways of punishment. "Extra duty" based on age appropriate chores, are a good way of teaching them that if you fail to do something wrong you wont be sitting in a corner with you imagination to keep you company, you will have to do something constructive (that you may not want to do) to make up for your lack of repect. There are the strong-willed type that will take a few times to adapt to this method. If they refuse then more will pile on until they are up to their ears and will take them a good amount of time to work out of it. If you stick to your guns and you will find that they will not want to go through it again and think twice before challenging your authority.

See also: time out, punishment, chores, no, respect

Written by Jenny

Posted on 01/20/2010

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Answers:

hi my name is shanda i am a mother of 2 n i totally disagree with you when you state that children don't have a choice its unfair to not let children have a choice on what it is they may or may not want to do i think that of course to a certain extent a child doesn't have a say on what he or she may or may not want to do as a parent you are to interfere only when you see that your child is unable to make the correct choices whether big or small if you take their god given right when not necessary its like telling them they have no rights as a human which can n probably will leave a misconception in their minds about many situations in life such as knowing n doing whats best for them throughout their life keep n mind when you tell your children they have no choice which is very similar to telling them they have no rights that they are the future with all the cold heartd n cold thinking our government is doing amongst us as people there WILL come a day n time one or many of our children will raise n fight for their beliefs rights n they will need to know how to voice their choice for what is right for them

posted by Shanda on 01/20/2010

Shanda you sound like you are living in some dystopian future somewhere. The OP was just stating that among certain things there is no choice. I am the same way and my daughter who is almost four is a very independent, well-behaved and respectful child. She uses her manners, asks for my permission, has a bed time, eats ALL her food. Can she choose what to wear? Sure. Can she choose if she wants broccoli or carrots? Why not? Can she choose to go to sleep at 11? No. You as a parent should provide choices that you will be happy with w/e they decide. And btw, setting up a routine and teaching good habits very early on is another great way to avoid pretty much everything you were rambling on about.

posted by Arianna on 09/01/2013

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