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ok my daughter is two and wont listen to a word i say she is the best of kid to anyone eles but with me she is out of control my friend says its my falt that i baby her to muchthat i do this and i do that but i dont belive its my fault im depressed hurt going through a divorce and living with my parents their 3 kids and my grandma 8 people in one house and no job i feel like im sinking in quick sand and cant pull myself out please is there anyone out there to pull me out please come quick |
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First off I am sorry to hear about all the negative things in your life right now. It's hard enough to raise a 2 year old let alone all the rest you are going through. Try to stay positive and look to the future, know things will change, and do what you can to make it change for the better. Don't be too hard on your self or the ones around you that you love if it's hard for you it's probably hard for them too.
When my son was 2 he was out of control with me too and an angel for everyone else. I felt like somehow I was failing miserably as a parent because I didn't know what to do. All I can say is part of it is the age and at least your daughter feels comfortable enough with you to be unruly. It shows she trusts you will love her no matter what so good job on that front. If you can't handle any more though you need to focus on being as objective as you can about the situation and see if maybe your daughter is trying to get you attention by being bad because it works. If that's the case change isn't going to happen over night but if you give her lots of attention for being good and try to minimize the attention she gets when she is being bad she may start being good for you. Try to see what sets her off and prevent it. It may be that she is tired, bored, hungry or whatever at different times of the day and expresses her dissatisfaction by picking on you because she can't express why she is uncomfortable at the moment. If you can find the triggers that cause the bad behavior and react to it in a different way you might get a different outcome. Otherwise just keep trying and she will probably eventually outgrow it. Good Luck.
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| posted by on 08/25/2009 |
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First off I am sorry to hear about all the negative things in your life right now. It's hard enough to raise a 2 year old let alone all the rest you are going through. Try to stay positive and look to the future, know things will change, and do what you can to make it change for the better. Don't be too hard on your self or the ones around you that you love if it's hard for you it's probably hard for them too.
When my son was 2 he was out of control with me too and an angel for everyone else. I felt like somehow I was failing miserably as a parent because I didn't know what to do. All I can say is part of it is the age and at least your daughter feels comfortable enough with you to be unruly. It shows she trusts you will love her no matter what so good job on that front. If you can't handle any more though you need to focus on being as objective as you can about the situation and see if maybe your daughter is trying to get you attention by being bad because it works. If that's the case change isn't going to happen over night but if you give her lots of attention for being good and try to minimize the attention she gets when she is being bad she may start being good for you. Try to see what sets her off and prevent it. It may be that she is tired, bored, hungry or whatever at different times of the day and expresses her dissatisfaction by picking on you because she can't express why she is uncomfortable at the moment. If you can find the triggers that cause the bad behavior and react to it in a different way you might get a different outcome. Otherwise just keep trying and she will probably eventually outgrow it. Good Luck.
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| posted by on 08/25/2009 |
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Read these:
http://pediatrics.about.com/od/toddlers/a/05_terrble_twos.htm
http://family.go.com/parentpedia/toddler/behavior/toddler-terrible-twos/
Remember- it's just a phase...it will pass. |
| posted by Kimberly on 08/27/2009 |
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| It is just a phase it won't completly pass but it will get better. Even at 2 years old you can use time outs. Pick a corner or a chair or any designated area for a time out spot. When she misbehaves put her there. The 1st 2 or 3 days is a little rough becuz they constantly get up and run away from the spot. Keep putting her back. Each time reset the timer. After a couple days she will just sit there. It really does work, but you have to be consistent with it. You cant put her there sometimes then not do it the next time. Make some kind of reward thing, like a piggy bank. When she is being really good, or she helps you with something then give her a penny, nickel anything for her to put in her piggy bank. Tell her when she gets a dollars worth then yall can go to the dollar store, conv. store for candy anything you set out you want to do. Tell her the better she behaves the more money she will earn. Thats what worked on mine. My 3 kids arent perfect, but it really made life more tolerable. They weren't as unruley as they once were. Hope this helps & hang in there. Hang in there. It will get better. |
| posted by Kelley on 09/04/2009 |
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| I agree 100% withe kelley's time out advice thats what i do with my 2 yr old. just be consistant and keep putting her back into time out and she will learn about consiquences for her actions. all i have to say to my son is stop it or your going to time out and he stops doing what he's doing cause he knows i will follow through. my friend has a verry strong willed child that she has problems with but for example at a playdate the other day she grabed a toy from another child. my friend scolded her daughter and told her to give back the toy and say i'm sorry but the 2 yr old refused. she told her if you don't say your sorry we are leaving. and i was very proud of her for qiving a consiquence. but she didn't follow throuh (as usual) and her daughter never said i;m sorry or returned the toy and while she was crying over the whole thing my friend was holding her and stroking her telling her it's ok you just have to be nice ok sweetie. so the 2 yr old wins. she pushes and pushes because her parents don't follow through and hold her accountable for her behavior. she has no fear of consiquence because her parents are not consistant. when she said if you don't do.....or we are leaving that should have been that and she shoulda left and then the kid would know mommy means business! remember you are the boss. but also since there is so much transition in your life cut her some slack but just remember your the boss! |
| posted by MARY-EL... on 11/11/2009 |
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