I'm not a single mother...yet im raising her alone. -

I'm not a single mother...yet im raising her alone.

I have a 2 year old daughter. She is amazing. She is my world. The thing is...Her father..although he loves her...dosent spend time with her or really do any of the typical"parenting" things. Even when he is with her...his back is to her and he is on the computer or watching tv. He is never actually 1 on 1 with her like i ALWAYS am. She is my first child...his fourth. Im 25 he's 36. I didnt think that "been there done that" outlook with him would roll over onto being a parent too. He is never here..always working..which i understand but he dosent realize why im frusturated..i just hate being in a relationship when it feels like im a single mom 100%...ahhh im just so frusturated.....

Written by Shes_my_life

Posted on 05/31/2009

See all posts by Shes_my_life

Answers:

Maybe you can encourage him to show some kids computer game to your daughter so that he can have his computer time and she can have her dad!

posted by Vero on 06/01/2009

Have you expressed your feelings to him? Maybe he doesn't see anything wrong with the way things are. Maybe this is the only way he knows how to be with his kids.

posted by TPW on 06/01/2009

Have you expressed your feelings to him? Maybe he doesn't see anything wrong with the way things are. Maybe this is the only way he knows how to be with his kids.

posted by TPW on 06/01/2009

Well she has computer games and she watches barbie and other movies on the computer but he dosent play them with her. I do. It just seems like he is to busy to be bothered sometimes and it breaks my heart. She loves her daddy so much. I have talked to him about it and he dosent see where im coming from. He thinks I want him to spend every waking hour with her that he is not at work and i dont. I would rather him have her for 10 minutes where she is smiling and his attention is 100% hers than have 3 hours of them just in the same room both doing there own thing. He really dosent see a problem...he dosent see what i see either...I think i just kind of wanted more when it came to how "my family" was going to be. Im 100% happy with my daughter...she is perfect but with him..theres ALOT missing. He isnt the kind of guy to admitt he is doing something wrong..it turns into me overreacting and i need ot deal with it. I always have to deal with it...Our relationship is strained and this is not helping. I have been with him for 8 years and im always the one who has to deal with it. My feelsing being hurt is fine...but when i see my little girl sad or hurting over this (which although shes only 2 she is effected) she knows daddy dosent talk or play with her...i wont do it. I dont know...im so confused....Im going on and on about 50 diffrent things....sorry...thankyou for the suggestions.

posted by Shes_my_life on 06/02/2009

I know exactly what you mean! My husband is always busy with school and work and when he's home he's watching sports and other tv! He will play with the baby every now and then but if something happened in the game then he ignores the baby and texts a friend about it! He even gets mad at the baby when he wants to play with him if he's watching something. My baby doesn't realize it yet, he's still young. the only thing i worry about is that when my son is 2-3 and old enough to play sports, that he's gonna take him from me all day and be the fun parent. I'm so detached from the situation at this point that i don't care if i raise him myself, but don't come around in a few years and play the cool sports dad card! sorry i'm not really helping, i just needed to rant! I'm sorry for your baby but i don't see the situation changing anytime soon! its been going on for too long ya know

posted by Erica on 09/20/2009

I know exactly how you feel. My husband is also in school & working therefore alot of the responsibility falls on me. I agree it is very frustrating and many of days I have questioned why am I even married and why did I have not 1 but 2 children with this man because he doesn't seem to into this family at times. He barely holds our new baby. He usually holds her more when it seems like im going over the edge. I don't wanna be too negative but it's hard. I have put a lot of thought in to this and I think they (men) don't realize how hard it is to be a good mother. They don't know how to put themselves in other peoples shoes and take us for granted. They are completely clueless.

posted by Felicia on 09/26/2009

Your answer: